I love you to the moon and back

Look, I'm not... Scared okay? There's a reason I don't want to go. There's a reason I'm here, I swear! I-

...

I can't even explain this to myself huh. Every year one is selected from a voice in our heads. The voice, we have to follow. Have I heard it? Thank god, the answer's no.

The voice seems to make you do things... And I'm trying to block it all out.

I have to avoid the Gnelof - they won't stop looking for me at this time so...

Right, right I need a plan uh... OK, OK that

That should be fine uh yeah okay ok

...

Shoot what the hell am I doing. My watch says 25 minutes left but my brain tells me everything in the world is a lie, not very useful honestly.

The Gnelof are giant floating eyes in the sky, and at this point it sounds like I've been on something. It's not my fault I didn't grow up with these things.

Ever since the first spaceman it has changed everything. Why are they even here? Nothing makes goddamn sense anymore I-

...

10 minutes.

...

Ah shoot okay okay so, just keep going this way and get... Get the keys right okay it's. It's this key okay. Now just to check who's looking without looking like I'm looking for who's looking for me oh god I'm going insane okay okay which GODDAMN KEY IS THIS

...

Oh it's this one

...

Okay everything's fine I'll just lock this. Door and okay okay. Okay. 2 minutes. Okay. Headphones, check and some weird music, also check.

---

The headphones made a popping sound,but I don't really want to focus on that. God damn ill make my own tune if I have to god okay... okay.

...

My legs move. I move with them and it seems to be fine. I got my headphones in and I'm listening to this really interesting documentary.

My legs move. I move with them. That's.

That's not me. What happened to my music? Oh.

Ohh my god okay okay it's actually happening to me too.

First they took you then they take me too huh? They really had to take me because I'm the only one who knows huh. I'm the only one who knows who you are.

They take me there, I mean we'll, I take me there, and I get in the suit... God why me I can't even drive at all you can't just throw me into a ship and then I magically know every single butto-

Oh so I'm a genius rocket scientist but I can't even control my goddamn body. God why am I so funny in a very traumatic state but at parties I'm like a strange wooden plank.

I hate life.

I press buttons that obviously make sense to me now and I just... Go. I go to where it was promised.

The moon.

I... Should be feeling fear but in fact all I feel is... Sadness.

She was the last one up here, to the moon. So... Why isn't she back? They have a 100% return rate but people return spaced out (heh.) but why didn't she..?

Where are you...

It reaches 10 seconds till landing, and for some reason I'm not worried at all...

They let me out, with a rope attached to my back. Land.

On the moon? Well yes of course on the moon you idio-

Why? What the hell are we doing here?

We?

Wow space is really weirding me out. I don't... Get this.

Land.

No not yet I don't -

Land.

No, I said not yet so I'll just chi-

La-

We both hear a crash and something appears. It's a.

Puddle.

It's a bit weird honestly, I was NOT expecting that but what the hell.

Touch it.

Nah I think I'll -

My legs move. I move with them.

Sir we are in Space we cannot move so easily, even I know that okay let's just chill.

TOUCH IT.

BRO JUST GET OUT MY HEAD GODDAMN I - I am starting to not like you honestly.

Touch it.

OK scratch that I didn't like you to begin with.

Touch it.

Do you even care?

Touch it.

...

We hear a loud bang. Well, one of us does. One of us? What do I mean by that?

...

Hello?

I check my arm and wipe down a bit on the reflective piece of my space suit. I look into it. My brain. Has a hole in it.

Honestly, with everything acknowledged the worst part about this has to be the fact that I'm not any dumber. The moon is so rigged. I hate it here too.

"then come with me."

"hello?"

"follow my voice." they say, almost like a whisper to my head. Mainly because it's cut in half.

"o-okay..."

I drift slowly towards the tiny murmurs I keep hearing and...

"you."

"you remembered me. You knew me, and you held on-

"you're supposed to be... Dead..."

"but you saved me!"

"you... You're dead..." I say, holding the urge back to cry out of disgust.

Who the hell is this

"I love you, and I always have please just... Come here.."

"you're dead."

"please just... Hold me."

I wonder closer to her as I feel her life swarm with mine. Its... Its her.

"I've been stuck here. For... So long. My rope it got, it got cut off from my ship and I didn't- I didn't know what to do and i-"

I hold her as she sheds tears like I've never seen before. Raw sadness drips down from her eyes, and I copy it completely.

She breathes in rapidly and pushes me back. In the process it puts a lot of space between us... Why?

" it was only a matter of time but please... Just... -

" what the hell are you on about?" I shout, anxiously awaiting a response

" when I shot your head the alien was removed, but the alien splattered onto your rope. That's why it also attacked your head too. It's been lonely out here but... Promise to come back... Please... I know you never wanted to get chosen but jus-"

"WHY DID YOU PUSH AWAY WE COULD HAVE GONE BACK"

I shout but I fear that she's too far now.

She takes off her helmet.

She gasps for air but can't take any. She shouts, but space doesn't let sound travel so... I looked. I looked at her struggling for air. The last thing she said was

"I love you to the moon and back... Come back for me... I'll be waiting." and as soon as it ended I landed inside the cargo of the ship. The ship that took me here.

---

I was never chosen again. She's still out there.

I love her to the moon and back too. I-

...

I hope she knows that.