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Mystery Fantasy Drama

Mama, Mama!! I saw it, I saw it, Odiase screamed out loud in fear, Mama came out and asked, Odiase son, what have you seen? Odiase replied I can’t comprehend what I have seen. Mama asked gently but fearfully, son, if you would just describe what you saw, I am sure I would make sense of it. Odiase replied I can’t describe a creature without a face. Mama screamed out loud Mama! Mama went inside in a rush to check up on her Mother, she slammed the door, sweating and panting, once again she asked the same question, Mama are you alright?. Odiase’s grandmother looked at her beautiful daughter and told her to go get her grandson, Mama screamed at her, that wasn’t what I asked you, Mama said I’m sorry, I will go get Odiase, Mama went outside to go get Odiase, Mama called Odiase, Odiase asked Mama why am I feeling like this, Mama asked fearfully and calmly how are you feeling? Odiase replied I feel horror and acceptance. Mama sighed and whispered to herself, but how and why, why she asked again. Odiase went inside, Looked at his grandmother, Odiase said with haste, you would not believe what I have seen, Odiase’s grandmother replied, I am eighty-five years old my dear, I’m sure I have seen just about enough in my lifetime. Odiase’s grandmother said to Odiase, why don’t you come here son, and tell what you have seen. Odiase told his grandmother, I saw a creature, with wings and feathers, it looked like a fowl, but with a humanlike behavior, the creature had a stick, and on the top of the stick, I think I saw a skull, I am not sure what was on the stick because it was a covered up with a bloody and dirty rag, but it was shaped like a skull. Odiase’s mum nervously shakes her legs and chews her nails, Odiase’s mother gently asks her Mother, Mama have you taken your pills today? Her Mama replied yes darling, you gave them to me thirty minutes ago. Odiase’s mother told Odiase why don’t you go play outside, your grandmother and I want to have some time alone, Odiase’s grandmother yelled, no! I want both of you to be here with me. Odiase went on with his story, but Odiase's Mother kept on asking her mother questions. Mum, did you drink enough water today? Mum, should I give you more medicine? Mum, it looks like your face is a little bit swollen on the right side. Mum, how are your legs feeling? Odiase grandmother got frustrated and called her daughter by her name saying “ Agonia!! I have been paralyzed for six years, I can barely feel anything from my waist down! She took a deep and assertive breath and asked gently why don’t you go and give your son and me the best coffee we could have? Odiase’s Mum wanted to ask another question, but her mother quickly shut her down “ Agonia!! I am an eighty-five-year-old woman that doesn’t have enough energy, please, go make your son and me some coffee, Odiase’s mum looked at her mother in anguish when she said she doesn’t have enough energy, at once a deep sense of realization came upon her and she said: “ yes Mother, I will do that”. While she was on the way out to go make some coffee her mother yelled “ and add some extra sugar, no, add a lot of sugar”. She looked at her Mum in anguish as a dropping tear came down from her eyes, her voice cracked and she said “ Mum you haven’t had sugar in years, why now? Odiase’s grandmother replied because “ I haven’t had it in years, besides, Odiase could use some extra sugar to add some extra taste to his life” she smirked. About a few minutes later, Odiase’s mum came back with three cups of coffee, she offered her grandmother and son a cup of coffee, and, made one for herself, she asked her son a question, she said, son, did you have any interpretation for what you have seen? Odiase replied I couldn’t see the face of the creature, but it looked like a big raven, maybe it came here to send a message or to take something away. Odiase asked gently looking at both his mother and grandmother he said “ mum did you know what it means? His mother replied with tears dripping down from her eyes down to her lips, you are too young, she sniffed, you are too young to know such omens, you are young to lose someone, you are too young for these memories, Odiase’s grandmother replied with tears dripping down from her eyes to saying “ yes he is, I can see it, I can see the grim reaper, I see it, but it refuses to talk to me”. Odiase’s mother looked her mother and her son in the eyes, she dropped her cup of coffee and hugged them both, she sobs and wipes her tears on her mother’s chest she said: “ Mother don’t leave us”. When Odiase heard those words from his mother, he cried out loud, he yelled in pain, held her in the grandmother’s arm, and kissed her on the cheek and the forehead. Odiase’s grandmother looked outside, she saw the sun coming down and the moon coming up, she told her daughter and her grandchild, it is time, it is time for the grim reaper to pass his judgment, Odiase’s mother said she would sleep by her side tonight, If this is her last night, she wants to beside her mother, Odiase’s grandmother agreed, she also wanted her grandson by her side, but the bed was not big enough for three people. Odiase went to bed sad, the night drew near, a terrifying song began to play, the whole family could hear it, ancient instruments started playing, the danse macabre began, Odiase mother held her mum and wanted to see death, she had so many questions, after a while, the singing, the instrument, and the dancing stopped. A quirky sound came out from nowhere, Odiase’s grandmother realized the grim reaper wasn’t there for her, Odiase’s mother on the other hand was so happy, she thought death has spared her mother lives, she hugged her mother, but her mother felt cold and numb, her mother whispered in despair with her eyes wide open “ please go check-up on my grandson”. At once Odiase’s mother stood and sobbed, my son! My son, no not my son, as she stood up, the grim reaper came into the room, with her son in his head, she fell and asked why? The grim reaper told her it wasn’t for him to decide, death comes for us all, it doesn’t serve us right, it doesn’t serve us equally but it serves us all eventually. She sobs and asks gently can I talk to me for a moment? the grim reaper replied dead man tells her dead man tells no tales, the dead are dead and the living are still living, she asked again is there the Other side? He replied I am carrying him to the other side.

July 02, 2021 21:45

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03:03 Jul 11, 2021

Interesting twist at the end! I like the reaper's response to the mother's question. If it's OK with you, I'd like to make a few suggestions, as I found this a bit hard to read. The story would be much easier and more enjoyable to read if you: 1. Broke it up into paragraphs, so it isn't one big wall of text. Places where you switch speakers are good places for that - for example, the grandmother's speech should go in one paragraph, and the mother's reply in another. 2. Consistently used quotation marks to begin and end quotes, so it's eas...


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