A small event as tiny as a drop of a pin can change the direction of your entire life

Bangambiki Habyariman

The stars were shining so brightly that it burned my eyes I hated them, it irked me to no end, that they were so far from my reach; But they reminded me of my childhood.

that was more painful.

I remembered my mother softly telling me

“Allina papa is watching us from the stars”

 And I would nod even when I did not understand what she meant.

lies that was it.

The waves were fighting one another and despite the irritating nosies of the cars; I wanted to stop them. The wind was so so cold I covered my hands together but what could it do.

I lean on my car placing a hand on its cold metal and something struck me then the tears started falling, and I knew I should stop but I could not.

I remember the day I came home; it was the first time I ever scored highest in my class, even my teachers had praised me.

 “I knew you could do it good job Allina”

The moment I reached home I noticed she was not there, But even then I checked everywhere I waited, asked around the neighbours it was the next night aunt came to pick me.

Crying and gently keeping me here in her tight grip.

“I am sorry.”

“Hey you okay,”

 I felt someone cautionary touching my shoulder as I sobbed, pushing the hand away.

“Don’t t-t-touch me.” I yelled at the person. 

He put his hands Infront of him “okay calm down.”

I held myself from crying somehow and peeked at the man Infront of me; he seems older wearing a brown coat; I placed my hands around myself tighten.

 “You see much better now” he spoke nervously moving his pale fingers through his hairs he suddenly offered me a handkerchief pointing towards my face.

 “um…. hmm here don’t get the wrong idea I am just ”

Then he said something that shocked me,

“you are here to suicide, are you?’

I stared at him as he chuckled; it echo in the shore,

 “Any one can Tell”

What an absurd thought. Did it seemed that way?

I shifted, trying not to face him and declared “no”

“Did not look that way to me so what’s your trouble,” I scowled at him,

What was his problem why would I do something like that I just came to clear my mind god help me

“nothing for you to concern yourself with” I said trying to make him go away.

He grinned “Ahh, but you are mistaken as a doctor it is my duty to a patient do you even know how many cases like this happen each day’

“You are a doctor,” I inquired, and then I looked at him, his had black. Hair style backwards, wearing a brown coat and underneath it was a white collar shirt paired with black Jean.

Compared to him she must have looked like a old ugly woman she sighed

“Of Crouse I am, hey, don’t stare at me like here have this”

He places a white card in my hand. 

In italics there was an address and a name on it Dr. Zannon Chance PhD phychritrise.

There were only the waves and the breezy wind, the card in my hand felt heavy was this a sign I noticed the stars again.

Am I so pathetic.

 Am I so selfish if I leave, then Maria would be alone how can I not think of her.

The Doctor stood there watching me as he said nothing but covered me with his brown coat, blocking the icy air.

After a few minutes, I glanced at him.

“Here” he said giving me a tissue.

I took it embarassed at my present state,

“Thank you” my voice was a slightly dry.

The wind was slowly rising and the stars again took my attention Mama Papa why did you leave was I so..

 The doctor said putting his hands in his pockets 

“Life is always like that Miss people leave but the living must go on.”

Anger rose in me as I took a deep breath trying to control myself there was no point fighting a stranger what did he knew about me, anyway I nodded.

“What was it not the case” hearing doubt in his voice, I felt somewhat better.

 “Oh, no how can you be wrong after all my life is like a cabbage of Crouse I would throw it away” I said letting all my furstration out

He seemed Stunned “I did not mean it, it’s just the way you were crying I thou…"

He stopped in the middle, how dare he say that does he has no common sense 

I tightened the hold on the card, trying not to hit him and letting all the anger on the card, itade me feel better

“Didn’t you said you were a phychritrise,” holding the card Infront of me I examine it.

“Are you sure about it” I asked him was he trying to prank me, he did not seem that type.

The look on his face was priceless but shrugged his shoulders 

And said “I am off duty right now”

“Amazing” I mumbled softy I can’t believe it, now the god won’t even let me cry, and he even sends a fool to me.

“It’s too late right now you should go home,” the doctor said that I realized 

It was too late, she must be waiting for me. 

I wanted to hit myself ahh I mess up everything.

“You are right” I replied as I made my way towards my car. 

I was just getting inside when he called me “listen!”

I stopped midway and glanced at him “yes”

He came near and gave me a flustered smile, “you forgot this”

 it was the star key chain my mother gave me on my last birthday; I had thrown it away in anger.

 I looked at the doctor and felt grateful towards his kindness.

I took the key from him. 

“Thank you, thank you very much.”

He stepped away from the car “take care, miss”

I made my way home, to Maria, my angel, she was enough then my thoughts went back to the man I met Zannon I called his name, 

I was grateful. Looking at the card, I realized I would soon visit him.

The chilly air kept me sober as I made my way home to my Maria and suddenly the stars weren’t that bad they shone brightly and soothe me and made me realize 

that I was not alone she was with and mama’s voice came to me again

        “Allina, I will always be with you

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.”

– Dalai Lama