Seemingly Earth

One day, the sun rose in the west and set in the east. I had no idea how or why, I thought maybe my compass was broken, even though I distinctly remember it working perfectly fine right before the sandstorm swept me up.

Heaven only knows how far it had carried me because this, this place looked nothing like the desert I was in. Don’t get me wrong - it still was well, a desert, and deserted. But, in a weird way, you know like a different weird, an unknown weird, if you will.

And, it was hotter, imagine lead melting hot, I was holding up surprisingly, well, for how long, that remained to be seen.

I was walking, looking for my mate when suddenly…package? Oh my God, my package! Despite being strapped to my chest like a newborn to their Mum who is hiking on a steep hill for the first time with the baby, the sandstorm had ripped away from me, my oh so precious package.

I had to find it, even if it killed me, or, I would definitely die.

Torn between finding my fragile friend – who, between you and I, let’s be honest, was either killed in the storm or, because of his nerves after it – and, the package, I decided to go ahead with trying to find the loyal idiot, considering maybe he somehow had it and I would save my efforts.

Making my way Eastward and silently hoping that it in fact was East and my compass was still a reliable piece of instrument, not to mention the only piece of instrument I had left on me, I tried to peer through the settling dust to look for where we were camped but, nothing! The only thing I could see was stretches of sand and what looked like in the distance to be volcanos? What? No, not possible, I was definitely experiencing some sort of concussion, this was a war zone with soldiers and tanks and guns and dry air, not volcanos.

I will spare you the details of my struggles of wandering through the sand, weeping and cussing and fill this time by filling you in.

We were two different platoons stationed about 10 miles from each other across the desert. My platoon could see the approaching sandstorm and while we debated staying or moving, our commissioner commissioned me to deliver an urgent package, yes you’re right this is  “the” package, that apparently detailed our whereabouts in case you know, we died and stuff, to our other or, rather, main station. And, yadi yadi yada, we were on our way, the storm picked up speed, we lost our camel and the package, and also the loyal idiot we had with us.

Which brings us to the present – the then present, where I was desperately trying to maintain a semblance of sanity for noone’s but my own sake. Nothing made sense, I mean it. I must have walked more than 8 miles by now but there were no camps, no stations, hell, I didn’t even hear a gunshot. This was eerily strange, no signs of armed forces in a heavily armed region, you had to be on a different planet for this.

The absurdity of the geographic change troubled me, I had to have been completely misplaced from my point of origin to have reached this even more barren (if it were possible) and devoid of life place.

For eons of miles you could only see red sand and craters, with sparse flat land. The intermittent lightning over what still appeared to be volcanos made me feel like I was in the first ominous fifteen minutes of a horror movie where everything goes wrong and the character on camera dies, I knew I was that character. Gathering what was left of my courage and brain, I ventured forward into the unknown while Toxic by Britney Spears played in my mind to, you know, calm my nerves.

While I forayed ahead, I think the gods took mercy upon me for I thought I saw my loyal idiot – though, I’ll be honest I did think I just might be hallucinating – and behind him a large building and establishment of sorts which I knew would be our main station.

I waved and yelled frantically as I ran toward him and saw him emerge from the dusty air blowing around. And, lo and behold, it was my loyal idiot friend Ganis but, he looked unaffected, scratch that, he looked serene, like he hadn’t been through the sandstorm.

“Are you actually standing there looking your best or, are we both dead?”

No response, just a smile, this was not what I was expecting.

“Are you going to say something? Do you know where the package is? How did you come here after the storm?”

Again, no response, now I was getting antsy, suspicious and, angry.

“Is that all you noticed?”, he finally said.

I was more confused than ever in trying to understand what he meant by that. But before I could open my mouth, I read his expression and followed his gaze and now had my mouth open for a completely different reason.

The Sun, the Sun was behind him, behind the station, the station was Eastward, and it was evening. What in the name of Jesus, Mary and, Joseph?!

Before I could exclaim, Ganis grabbed my arm and put the half opened package in my hands, that bastard, he had it all along. I opened it to reveal a shiny plaque with a “Welcome Home to V” engraved on it - V for Victor, my name.

“Is this for me?”

“Yes, but no, the V doesn’t stand for Victor. Come, I’ll show you.”

And, with that, Ganis led me up through a fire escape to the terrace of the station, he pointed to a corner with a telescope, I followed him, turning back every few seconds to avoid being attacked in general, you know.

Ganis took the telescope, moved, calibrated and did whatever the hell it was he was doing with it. Then he stepped back, looking pleased with himself and motioned me forward toward it. 

I glanced at him with my knuckles still tight and the hair on my neck upright, I was still on edge, until I looked through the telescope and saw this huge sphere of blue and white and green. 

My adrenaline shot up, my eyes were the size of tennis balls, I felt the ground sway beneath my feet, and I looked up at Ganis, only to see him smiling as he said, “Welcome to Venus!” and, that my friends is when I saw the Sun set in the east.