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Fiction Funny Drama

Clink, Clink, Clink..


The chatter of the crowd continued animatedly. Drinks were being poured, appetizers handed out and employees were mingling. Jane stood at the front of the room, a few feet away from all the merriment, gin and tonic in hand. Tonight was not only the annual Christmas party but also the retirement celebration for her boss, Bryan Johnson. She had gotten the job as his personal secretary five years ago and Jane loved everything about her job. She was sad to see Mr. Johnson go, but also couldn’t help feel some excitement mixed in with the anxiety of getting a new boss.

Tonight, her thick blonde hair had been tamed into a side braid falling down her left shoulder. She felt especially proud of the new burgundy Yves Saint Laurent sleeveless blouse she had bought for the occasion. The deep burgundy material flowed and cinched in at her waist above a form-fitting pencil skirt. She even had on her favourite burgundy Prada heels. The entire outfit cost more than her rent but she loved their annual Christmas party and a girl had to spoil herself and get dressed up once in a while. 

Jane sighed and tried once more. Clink, Clink, Clink…”Ahem!” As a few people registered her attempts for attention, they began shushing the crowd and nudging those around them until the noise settled down and died. “Merry Christmas, everyone! I would like to begin tonight by wishing our fearless leader, Bryan Johnson, a glorious retirement. We are all so honoured to have worked for and alongside you. Over the past 20 years, you have made this company the success it is. Personally, I must thank you for the wonderful welcome I have had over the past five years. We will miss you dearly, but I know you will rock retirement with the same enthusiasm, charm, and grace that you brought to us every single day. Cheers!” 

As the crowd lifted their glasses, clapped, and catcalled, Mr. Johnson kissed his wife and then came to the front to give Jane a hug. “Thank you, Jane. You have been my saving grace these last few years as my work ball-and chain! I must give a heartfelt thank you to everyone here. I would not be here without the commitment, energy, and excellence you all bring every single day. I know I leave my company in the best of hands. You will also all be excited to know that the new CEO is on his way to join in the festivities tonight. William Stevenson is a bright, capable, and fierce businessman and will be a wonderful leader and addition to the team. So, everyone, please drink, eat, and be merry! I want you all to enjoy this much deserved night!”

Hmm, William Stevenson, she mused. Jane wondered what her new boss would be like. She had hit the jackpot with Mr. Johnson. He was the most patient, caring man and had been more like a father and mentor to her than simply a boss. 

“You look amazing!” her friend, Liliana, cried out disturbing Jane’s musings. Liliana jostled through the crowd towards Jane, attempting to balance her glass of pinot grigio.  

“Thank you,” Jane replied with a gracious smile.

“Seriously! You look incredible,” Liliana confirmed as she ran her eyes up and down Jane’s outfit. Liliana was loud and brash, but had a heart of gold and was the most supportive friend Jane had. Jane took in Liliana’s soft, wavy, brown tresses above her tight, little black dress and eye-popping blood red shoes. 

“You’re looking not so bad, yourself! Those shoes are killer!”

“So, where’s this new boss? William Stevenson. I’m dying to get a glimpse of him! I heard he’s our age. Fingers crossed he’s more Will Smith and less William Shatner!” 

“I know nothing about him,” Jane confided. “I’m so nervous. What if he’s a jerk or a misogynist or has terrible coffee breath every morning! The problem with being a secretary is that if my boss is terrible, I literally have to deal with him constantly.” 

“Well, if he’s hot then you are in the perfect position. Little miss secretary,” she nudged her friend and laughed. 

“Oh god, I might have permanent social anxiety if that’s the case,” Jane answered. 

Just then, Mr. Johnson came up behind Jane and tapped her on the shoulder. 

“Jane, looks like Mr. Stevenson has just arrived. I’d love to introduce you. You will be the perfect person to help welcome him to the office!” he beamed. “Okay!” Jane answered as her nerves heightened dramatically. All of a sudden, she felt like a spark plug, full of excitement, anxiety, and curiosity. Jane followed Mr. Johnson through the crowd of her co-workers wishing she had thought to refill her gin and tonic before heading to meet her new boss. As they were getting closer to the other side of the room, Jane eyed a small crowd forming around the entrance to the office. In the middle, stood a young man, oddly familiar….he was facing so that she could only see his side profile but she noted his dark, wavy but nicely trimmed hair and strong, chiseled jaw. As he was greeting the people closest to him, he turned ever so slightly so that Jane saw his face straight on. 

Oh my god! Jane shrieked internally. No, no, no… Jane immediately ducked down. She was now full on squatting in the middle of the party. She had a moment’s thought that her pencil skirt was not built for this. Mr. Johnson had continued on unaware. From behind, Jane heard someone asking, “Umm, Jane, are you okay?” Jane was frozen to the spot. What the hell should I do? I can’t hide like this much longer.

 “Ermm, just think I drank a little too much,” she replied, awkwardly. “I think I’ll go get some water”. Jane turned around, and without a glance back in her new boss’s direction did a direct streamline for the bathroom. 

Once in the safety of the women’s toilets, Jane beelined for a stall and sat down. What in the actual hell? she thought to herself. William Stevenson, Mr. Stevenson, is Willie Marks! But how can that be? Jane questioned. Slowly, the name Willie Mark Stevenson or William Mark Stevenson came back to her. Her old college boyfriend of maybe six months was her new boss! 

Jane tried to compose herself. She thought back to those college days. Ten years ago, when she had dated Willie Marks, he was a struggling musician. She was a business student. They had had a passionate, intense, and spirited relationship before Willie had dumped her and moved on with some new girl, right when she was starting to feel their relationship blossoming into something more. Her mind wandered back to laying on the beach, sun-kissed and frisky, watching him play guitar at Molly Bloom’s, the way he would graze his lips along her neck...Jane’s cheeks burned. Okay, she thought. What the hell am I going to do? This is mortifying. Willie Marks cannot be my new boss! I have to get out of here. I need time to think. I need fresh air. I need to catch a flight and start a new life in France! Jane stood up and flung open the stall.

“AGH!” a woman’s voice cried out as the stall door came bouncing back in Jane’s direction. 

“Oh my god!” Jane rushed out and saw her co-worker, Diana, standing with her hand up to her face, a dark merlot-coloured stain running down her crisp, white blouse. On the ground lay her knocked over glass. “Oh, no. Are you okay?” Jane asked. Diana turned to the mirror.

“Oh gosh, I’m fine. My blouse on the other hand is completely ruined.” She looked down at the merlot-stained shirt and sighed. “Don’t worry about it Jane. I’ll just try to wash it out a little...” Jane felt a tug of guilt growing inside her. She had completely ruined Diana’s top. 

“You know what. I was just leaving, anyways. I could swap you tops. I’ll go get it dry-cleaned over the weekend, see what they can do, and bring it back to you!” Jane declared. Her mind was made up. She was 100% leaving this party and getting the hell out of here. Nothing good was happening to her tonight.

“Oh, Jane, it’s okay, you don’t have to do that.”

“I insist!” Jane was firm in her stance. She took the now wet-top from Diana and started stripping off her precious Yves Saint Laurent blouse. For an instant, she felt her body reject this act of selflessness. She had put so much effort in her outfit tonight. Now, that would be all for nothing! However, she handed the top over and watched Diana put it on. 

“Okay, you go and enjoy your night!” she exclaimed and gave Diana a fierce hug. “Merry Christmas!”

“Merry Christmas to you, Jane! You’re such a lifesaver!” 

Well, Jane thought, at least I’ve done one good deed tonight even if I also caused the problem in the first place. Jane ran the top under the blow dryer. Once it was dry enough, she put it on and took a look in the mirror. The merlot stain was now a lighter red splotch across her chest, but it was the best that could be done. She sighed and thought about her next move. She would get to her desk, grab her purse, and then get the hell out of the office!

Jane exited the bathroom and took the most direct way down to her desk. She walked fast, not allowing anyone time to stop her for a chat. Once at her desk, she grabbed her purse and turned around. She was now ready to walk back across the office to the exit. She just needed to ensure Mr. Johnson and Willie Marks (aka. Mr Stevenson!) did not notice her. In a way, she thought the white blouse may help. If Mr. Johnson was looking for her, he would be looking for a burgundy top, not white. 

“Jane, what happened to you?” Carlos from advertising was walking up to her looking dapper and excited. Shit! Jane thought. “I’ve been looking for you, I thought you might like to catch up a bit. We never get a chance to talk anymore now that I’ve changed departments.” Carlos used to work just across the hall from Jane and would stop by her desk multiple times a day until he got promoted and was now further away. Carlos was sweet but he was also not Jane’s type. He was young and athletic but also pompous and overbearing. He also had the worst coffee breath! 

“Oh, ermm, well I was just leaving actually! I have the biggest headache and just wanted to go lie down for the night!”

“Oh no, Jane, that’s terrible. Well, why don’t you join me in my office for a few minutes. I can open the windows. You can get some fresh air and sit down for a bit and we can catch up a little,” he offered, hopefully.

“Oh, ermm, okay, just for a few minutes,” Jane acquiesced. At least in Carlos’s office she could still hide from Mr. Johnson and Willie. 

Once they entered Carlos’s office, Jane relaxed a little. Through the open door, she still had a view of the crowd out in the main room. She couldn’t help but roam her eyes back and forth, trying to ascertain where her new and old boss were. She couldn’t see either of them from her viewing point. Carlos was speaking but Jane could not focus on his words. Some words briefly registered: “....us….wondered…….hoping…...anyways….”

“Mmmm, mhmmm,” she nodded, hoping she wasn’t agreeing to wild sex on his desk. 

“Jane?!” Carlos was standing right in front of her now, blocking her view. 

“Sorry, Carlos. I’m just a little distracted. What is it you’re trying to say?”

“Jane, I’m trying to tell how I feel. I have been in love with you from the moment I started working here and laid eyes on you. You are perfect to me. Stains and all,” he briefly ran his hand along her spoiled blouse before he grabbed her hands and knelt down in front of her. “Please Jane, I just want to know if you feel the same. I just want the chance to show you how much I love you,” Carlos was choking up on his declarations of love. His eyes were looking up at her, pleading with her to give him a chance. 

Oh no, oh no, oh no. Jane was freaking out. Why this, why now? She didn’t know what to say and then her brain improvised on the spot. “Oh Carlos, didn’t I tell you? I’m dating Jeff from accounting. It’s only been a few weeks but I hope you can understand. I’m so sorry.” Jane stood up, taking Carlos’s momentary shock as an opportunity. “I’ll see you on Monday,” she called and darted out of the office. 

Jane still could not see either Mr. Johnson or Willie. Where are they?! she wondered. 

Shit, shit shit, Jane thought. Why had she told him she was dating Jeff? Was Jeff gay? He might be gay! Dammit. Hopefully, Carlos does not talk to Jeff! 

Jane focused back to the priority at hand. She needed to cross the office and get out the door without being noticed and without getting stopped again. Jane walked determinedly, making sure to avoid eye contact and keep her head down. She thought she heard someone calling her name behind her but she continued walking, ignoring them. She was almost there! Just a few more feet!

“Jane!” Drew called out to her as he entered the party. “How are you, girl? I am crazy late but here now and ready to get my drink on!”

Dammit!

“Sorry, Drew, I’m just leaving. Crazy night. I have had way too much to drink! Enjoy the party,” Jane spoke a mile a minute, rushing past Drew, not giving him a chance to keep her hostage. 

Jane exited the door and walked down to the elevator. She pressed the button for the lobby. As she was riding the elevator down to the main floor, she took a deep breath. Okay, not too much damage done. I can dry clean Diana’s top. I will have to do some type of damage control with Carlos and Jeff if they talk. Maybe I will just tell Carlos that Jeff and I broke up and Jeff will never find out! she hoped. The important thing was she had escaped without making a fool of herself in front of Willie. Damn, the more she thought about Willie, the more she remembered…The way he laughed,the small Pisces tattoo on his left wrist, the way he would run his finger along her cheek, the feel of his hands on her waist as they danced, the time he…

Ding! The elevator opened up and standing in front of her was William Stevenson! Not Willie Marks, the young man who had traced her body with his tongue but 10 years on, William Stevenson, a strong, smartly-dressed businessman, looking at her with shock and surprise!

To his left, stood Mr. Johnson, looking weary and bewildered.

“Jane!” Mr. Johnson exclaimed. “Where have you been? And what has happened to you?” he questioned, his voice full of concern. 

Jane stood rooted to the spot. Without a moment to think, she pressed the elevator close button, and cried, “Oh my, oops! See you upstairs.”

Ugh, Jane dropped down to the floor. She was acting spastic. Willie would surely think she was a freak who had lost her mind. Mr. Johnson may be concerned for her mental health at this point too. 

As the elevator reached back to the office floor, Jane stepped off and took another deep breath. She had two choices. Option one: Run, take the stairs, and never look back. Or, option two: face her old-ex-new boss and old boss like a mature grown woman. Everything in her wanted to run, but she was exhausted and knew she could not escape this situation forever and so she stood and waited. 

The elevator dinged open and out stepped Mr. Johnson and Willie. 

“Why, Jane, what is going on?” Mr. Johnson queried, his face rumpled in confusion. 

“Oh, nothing. Sorry. Silly elevator wasn’t working properly.” Mr. Johnson continued to gawk at her in confusion. 

“What happened to your top then? Where have you been?"

“Oh, that’s a funny story. I was just walking with you to greet our new boss here when I got pushed and someone’s merlot spilled all over my top. I was just in the bathroom trying to do my best to clean up. Well, it’s not a party without some kind of shenanigan, is it?” Jane tried to smile. She had not dared look over at Willie the entire time she spoke. She crossed her fingers hoping Mr. Johnson would not remember that she had been wearing a burgundy top at the beginning of the evening. Mr. Johnson continued to look bemused but did not question her further. 

“Well, I wanted to introduce you to William Stevenson. I guess late is better than never.” 

At that moment, Jane forced herself to look over to Willie. He was looking at her in amusement. His mouth twisted into a slight smirk. His eyes twinkled and he gave her a little wink. “I am very pleased to meet you, Jane. I expect we will be spending a lot of time together and I look forward to more shenanigans, as you say.”

“Ah, yes,” Jane replied. “I expect many more shenanigans await us.”



April 11, 2021 23:26

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3 comments

Daniel R. Hayes
05:28 Apr 13, 2021

Hi Erika, I really liked this story. I thought you made good use of the prompt and you did a great job writing this. I also liked Jane's personality. You did a good job bringing her to life. Overall, I thought this was very well done, and I liked the humor. Great job!

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Erika Crowley
12:56 Apr 13, 2021

Thank you! I wanted to attempt something more comedic so I'm very glad you enjoyed it!

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Daniel R. Hayes
14:36 Apr 13, 2021

You're welcome, I hope you keep writing!

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