The Book of Sacrifice

Submitted into Contest #65 in response to: Write about a group of witches meeting up on Halloween night.... view prompt

4 comments

Science Fiction Thriller

I woke up with a pounding headache. Shadows danced around my hazy vision. My hands were tied behind my back. I couldn’t focus long enough to do anything about it. I wanted to scream, but my body wouldn’t let me. Two women were having a conversation. Their words began to sound clearer as I came to.

             

“I just don’t understand why we can’t just drain some of his blood and let him go. He won’t remember a thing,” a woman said.

             

“I’ve explained this before, Charlotte. We need his heart, not just his blood. I know this is your first time, but pay attention,” said the other woman.

            

 I shook my head, hoping to wake myself up. I was tied to a large tree. We were in a clearing, probably in a forest somewhere.

             “Who are you people?” I asked.

             

Both women walked over to me, studying me closely. One of them pulled my right eyelid open and examined it.

             

“Liza, leave him be. We don’t have to torture him,” Charlotte said.

             

“Hey! You’re awake. Don’t worry, it will all be over soon,” said Liza.

             

The two women started chanting. I couldn’t make out what language it was. A large fire ignited all on its own in between a circle of rocks. Both women wore red, silk robes and black masks covering their eyes.

            

 “Please answer me. What am I doing here? I asked.

             

Liza came over to me, she was holding a large knife. She traced the knife across the outline of my chest.

             

“Every good sacrifice needs a great offering,” Liza replied.

             

I squirmed and pulled at the ropes. Clenching my teeth, I strained to free myself. It was of no use. I only caused myself to get rope burn.

             

“I did nothing to you. Let me go. I won’t even call the cops or anything like that,” I said.

            

 Liza lifted the knife, ready to thrust it into me. I closed my eyes and braced myself.

            

 “No, don’t hurt him. We need his heart, remember? Raya will be angry if she finds out we spilled his blood too early. Let me deal with him. I’ll watch him. We need more firewood anyway,” Charlotte said.

           

  I opened my eyes to find Liza long gone. Charlotte ran up to me. She grabbed my face and kissed my forehead.

             

“I’m so sorry, David.”

            

 “Damn it, Charlotte. What in the world did you get us into?” I replied.

            

 Charlotte loosened the ropes behind me. I moaned from the pain. My arms felt like they were on fire.

             

“We’re so close to getting that book. You just have to hang on a bit longer, little brother,” Charlotte said.

             

“You want me to hold on, do you? And what do you suppose I do when they rip my heart out?”

            

 A loud laugh echoes off the trees. A woman in all black appears. Charlotte stabs the tree, right next to my head with a dagger. She faces the woman and kneels before her. Liza came back holding a pile of firewood and threw it to the side. She knelt next to Charlotte.

            

 “Raya, we found a man worthy enough for the book of sacrifice,” said Charlotte.

            

 Raya paced around me, checking me up and down like some sort of tenderized meat.

             

“Who the hell are you?” I asked.

            

 Liza got up and smacked me hard. I spit blood out to the side.

             

“Vile creatures like yourself do not address the high priestess directly unless spoken to.”

            

 Raya reaches her hand out for a leather book sitting by the fire. The book flies to her hand. It opens and pages flip around.

             

“He’s a little…Well…Small. No offense,” Raya said.

             

I smiled back at her. I just wanted to jump over there and snatch that book out of her hands, but I knew she could kill me instantly. I never thought we would get this close to it. After all this time searching, Charlotte found it. She was always the smarter one.

            

 “None taken,” I replied.

             

“All we need is your heart for our wonderful ceremony. I know you were wondering why you were chosen. The truth is, it has nothing to do with you at all. You’re a loner, a complete nobody. No one will even notice you’re gone, and I will become a goddess,” Raya said.

             

The three witches chanted in another language. My chest started to burn. I felt like my rib cage was being pried open.

             

“Ladies, ladies, we can talk about this. We can work something out. I’m not just a one sacrifice kind of guy!”

“Silence. It will be done,” Raya replied.

             

My vision went completely black. A large, red demon walks towards me. It picks me up by my neck. It reaches for my chest. A black portal forms behind the beast. I pointed at the portal.

            

 “Behind you.”

             

The demon looks behind it. It looks shocked to see this glowing gateway. I kicked it in the chest, sending it flying through the portal.

             

The book falls to the ground on fire. Raya looked at me with pure rage in her eyes. She turned her back to me.

            

 “You idiots. He’s a gatekeeper. Kill him.”

            

 I untied the ropes behind me. and put them around Raya’s neck and squeezed as hard as I could. Her face turned purple. She threw me over her back and into a tree. A sharp branch stabbed me in the back. She threw a knife into Liza’s chest. Raya pointed at Charlotte.

             

“No, Raya, let me explain,” Charlotte said.

             

“You knew he couldn’t be sacrificed, didn’t you?”

             

A portal formed behind Charlotte and she jumped through it. A new one opened in front of Raya and Charlotte jumped out at her. Raya caught her by her neck.


“You’re one of them too, huh? I’ll make sure you can never open a gateway ever again.”


She put both hands around Charlotte’s throat and turned her into stone. Her body stood there, frozen in time. I separated myself from the tree limb. I could feel it cutting into me. I crawled towards Charlotte.


“I’m going to kill you, Raya.”

             

Raya ran towards the book, holding her throat. I picked up a dagger and cut her leg as she ran past me. She fell on her chest and wormed her way to the book. I was too weak to send the book back to me through a gateway.

             

I couldn’t hold Raya back and open the portal. So, I opened one just under Raya’s arms. It was just big enough for her to fall through. She fell in headfirst screaming. I have no idea where I sent her, but hopefully it was a million miles from here.

            

 I got up and stomped the fire out on the book. I flipped through the pages. I couldn’t understand any of the writing or symbols. Some of the pages were burnt. This was…Is my sisters’ expertise. I needed her now more than ever. I didn’t know how long I had to turn her back to flesh and blood. I knelt by Liza, who was on her last few breaths.

             

“Hey, it’s okay. Raya is gone now, but we must save Charlotte. Please help me figure out how to use this damn book.”

            

 “Let me see the book,” Liza replied.

             

Liza read through the book as I tried to put pressure on her wound. She stopped on a page and looked at me with defeat.

             

“What’s the matter? Did you find something?”

             

“Yes, but it requires a sacrifice of kin. This is the debt that needs to be paid. After all, this is the book of sacrifice.”

             

Liza wheezes, I knew she didn’t have much time. I held back tears as I fought to keep Liza alive.

             

“I’m her brother. Just tell me what I have to do.”

             

“Gatekeepers are extremely powerful. You do not yet understand the power that you possess. If you cease to exist on this earth, all of the gateways you have ever opened will close forever. This may have never ending consequences for all of us."


I grabbed her arms, pleading with her to help me. The color was fading from her face. We didn’t have long.

            

 “Please, just help me free her and she will set things right.”

            

 “As a gatekeeper, you never truly die. You just move from one dimension to another. Some, you can never return from. If you can think of one of those places, that will satisfy the debt, and free your sister.”

            

 I knew exactly where I would go. I would send myself back to that place with that demon. I will shut that gateway and be trapped with that thing forever. Liza Started to chant. I could die just from opening this gateway. My last portal jump of my life. A gateway opened. I wasn’t ready to leave this world, but I had no choice. There was no turning back now.

             

“Go!” Liza said.

             

I jumped through the gateway to be lost forever. I was caught in between two worlds. I could see my sister on one side, and the demon on the other. Something was happening to Liza. A black fog entered her body. She gasped for air. Liza got up and pulled the knife from her chest. She laughed and walked away.

            

 “Fool,” Liza said.

           

I had a feeling Liza would play us, but I had no choice but to trust her anyway. Liza tapped on my sister, still made of stone.

            

 “Thank you,” Liza said.

             

To her shock, the stone around my sister started to crack. She did say gatekeepers never truly die. She’s going to learn that the hard way this time.

October 29, 2020 19:47

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4 comments

Dale Westervelt
00:57 Nov 05, 2020

Hi Mark! Critique Circle sent me your way. I'm new to Reedsy and to publishing my stories, but very much having fun. Just read your piece, which you rightly categorized as a "thriller." Action starts straight away with the first sentence and paragraph. You've done a nice job of this throughout the piece. In terms of critique, sometimes your writing could be tighter or cleaner. I don't say this as a sterile technical editorial comment. As a reader, I only want to be engaged in the story, and not conscious that I am reading a piece of writing....

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MJ Cummings
13:53 Nov 05, 2020

Thanks, Dave! I really appreciate your incite. Would you mind elaborating on the dialogue pattern?

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Dale Westervelt
16:18 Nov 05, 2020

If you go down through the piece and look at what you wrote after each quotation in the lengthy dialogue, you'll see "the woman said" and "I asked" and "Liza said" and "Raya asked" and so forth. Dale

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Dale Westervelt
16:33 Nov 05, 2020

https://blog.reedsy.com/how-to-write-dialogue/

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