Contest #83 shortlist ⭐️

Siren Songs and Lullabies

Submitted for Contest #83 in response to: Write a fantasy story about water gods or spirits.... view prompt

21 comments

Feb 27, 2021

Fantasy Fiction

Fish hook earrings glimmer, catching the meagre light. Maera’s long hair hangs heavy, reaching her navel. Slick as an eel, she glides and weaves in the water to evade her pursuer. She moves more out of instinct than forethought, just quick enough to stay ahead. Excitement sings in her veins, the high of the chase taking control of her actions. Pinwheeling in the water, she turns and holds out her arms to catch her sister. They sink to the bottom, sending silt upwards as they roll and tumble playfully. 

With difficulty, she pins Echo to the ocean floor. Her eyes flash gold, roiling and tempestuous as the sea. She cannot smile, but she bares her teeth in triumph. The expression wipes away all traces of humanity, leaving only savage cruelty. Echo mirrors the leer, and with a swift flip of her tail twists out of Maera’s grasp.

Finished with their game, they swam back to the village. Occasionally, they'd stop to pick the odd piece of seaweed, looping them into bracelets.

Time has adopted a familiar and unwavering rhythm for them. Like magpies, they collected trash daily. Bottle tabs woven into necklaces, stray beer bottles crafted into knives. One man's trash is a siren's treasure. Nearly everything in the village is handmade from plastic scavenged from thoughtless humans. Often, Maera marvels at the excess they produce. There was not a day she didn’t come across that durable flotsam and jetsam, like picking fruit from a never-ending tree.


On other days to break up the monotony, the entire village joins into chorus, unearthly and beautiful voices melding into one chilling choir. The hum from their song causes fish to freeze in place, as if they are holding their breath to listen.


Today is different though.


Ligei had given birth to a girl, who was healthy enough. Her eyes were white and milky, but soon they would darken. The infant’s fretful hunger cries filled the village. A baby was usually born to the village every century or two, but times had been lean and hungry. The last child to have been born to the village had been Echo, and she was several centuries old. To celebrate the birth, there would be weeks of feasting and prayers to the gods, old and new. 

Maera and Echo joined their other sisters, who were already plaiting and braiding their hair. Maera preferred to leave hers unbound, flowing freely. Whistling sharply, she motioned upwards for them to follow her. Dark water lightened as they travelled, and the pack began to hum. The very air pressure seemed charged and electric, Echo’s mouth curving into a hooked grimace. They swam for miles, searching for a boat. 

It couldn’t be just any boat though. They’d have to choose carefully. A cruise ship would be too risky, a skiff not worth the effort. What they needed to find was a small sailboat, preferably loaded with overweight, drunken men.

The kind who liked to wolf whistle at women.

The kind who made jokes about their "ball and chain" at home.

The kind who spit out cruel one-liners like shards of broken beer bottles.

When they came across a starboard bow with ‘Water U Looking At’, Maera knew they had found their mark. Only a simpleton would name their boat something so preposterously asinine. 

Breaching the water’s surface, Echo hoisted herself up the side of the boat, hanging off the side. Her dark hair fell in voluptuous waves, her beauty intoxicating to mortal men.

Echo opened her mouth to sing. The song was haunting and sonorous, and although Maera couldn’t see them, she knew that every man on the boat would be slack-jawed and rapt. Echo beckoned seductively, and from her place Maera saw a man approach. His eyes were blank and glassy, and his outstretched hands were inches from Echo’s face. The man’s gasping mouth reminded Maera of a fish: dumb and guileless. 

His fingers skimmed Echo’s cheek, and with that touch Echo went silent. A sudden and horrible clarity came over his face, and Echo's expression became bestial and dark.

Grabbing him, Echo pulled him overboard, the water’s surface surging and heaving from his thrashing and her tail. She dragged him downward, too deep for him to resurface. He still tried, paddling upwards with shocked and terrified vigour. Echo let him, like a cat playing with a mouse, before hauling him backwards with a jaybird laugh. 

While she was occupied with her toy, Maera and the others lay in wait. Within seconds, more men appeared at the gunwales, scanning the water desperately for their fallen friend. Quick as a whip, Maera and the others erupted out of the water and dragged them down screaming. Saltwater filled their victim’s lungs, screams bubbling out helplessly. 

They dragged the men down to the depths, singing once more. The siren song reverberated coldly in the water. Altogether, they’d managed to snare four men. Not quite as many as last time, but it was plenty for their purposes. 

Nothing would go to waste.

Their bones would be whittled into hair pins and combs, and the skulls would make excellent bowls. Playing with her earrings, Maera thought to herself happily that she could make new ones with the finger bones. They were so much prettier than the ones made of cut fishing line. Most important though were their hearts. The baby would need to feed on them to grow strong and healthy. 


Calling into the depths, they signalled to the others that the hunt had been successful. Soon, otherworldly shapes appeared in the gloom, helping tow the bodies downward. An excited chatter ensued from the older sirens, happy to have such a flush haul. The whole village set to task on preparing the feasts.

The women butchered skillfully, blood filling the underwater cave. It filtered into every part of the room, suffusing the water in a red glow. It felt like being inside a heart. An atrium for Echo to twirl and cartwheel through. She chanted all the while to keep away pesky sharks.

The water glowed with the force of the power and the incantations, and Ligei brought her child to bathe in the bloody water. 

The chanting grew in strength, until the baby began to exude a faint glow. Her tiny tail kicked back and forth happily, and Maera plucked one of the hearts out of the bowl. Cradling it in her hands, she swam to Ligei’s side and held it out. The baby sniffed tentatively at the air, then latched on to the heart and began to chew. Everyone smiled and cooed happily, tightening their circle to be closer to this new life. Affectionately, they watched the newborn baby gnaw on the heart muscle.

A rosy glow flushed in her cheeks, and her eyes slowly began to shift from pale cream to a darker hue. Her bloodied mouth yawned as she finished her meal, and Ligei rocked her gently.


Without having to speak, they broke into song together, singing to the child.


This time, it was a lullaby. 

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21 comments

K. Antonio
14:51 Mar 12, 2021

Congrats on getting shortlisted, Courtney!!

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Courtney C
15:13 Mar 12, 2021

Thank you! I'm honestly so happy and pumped right now :)

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Michael Boquet
15:56 Mar 03, 2021

Literally laughed out loud at "Water U Looking At" - great name for a boat. Nice personification of sirens. I had no trouble imagining what their lair looked like and how they swam through the water. I loved the description of what the sirens are going to do with their victims bodies/bones. Only thing I noticed, was the sentence: "The women were butchered skillfully" Did you mean to write 'men' instead of women? Or was that sentence supposed to be "The women were skillful butchers?" Really great story. I very much enjoyed it.

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Courtney C
23:27 Mar 03, 2021

Lol thanks for the feedback, and I'm glad you liked the story. :) That was definitely a typo, so thanks for picking that out and letting me know! I'll have to fix that.

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Michael Boquet
15:27 Mar 12, 2021

Congrats on being shortlisted!

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Doria Owen
19:11 Mar 12, 2021

Congratulations-well desired

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Julia Alice
16:50 Mar 12, 2021

This is so well written! The imagery was so natural for me to imagine, and I loved how the story got progressively creepier and haunting as it went on. Congratulations on getting shortlisted!

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Ellie Yu
16:26 Mar 12, 2021

Your writing style is so clear and evocative! I could easily picture what was happening in the story, and your word choices ("unearthly and beautiful voices") are ethereal. Congrats on the shortlist - this really deserves it!

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Holly Fister
15:55 Mar 12, 2021

This was fabulous! So many great phrases made this come to life: “a jaybird laugh,” “An atrium for Echo to twirl and cartwheel through.” It got progressively more creepy as it went on, “the skulls would make excellent bowls” and yet I started to cheer for the sirens more as well. Well done! I was as mesmerized as the men 😂

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Eddie Thawne
19:44 Mar 10, 2021

Wow. Amazing story. This was beautifully written. I enjoyed reading. Well done!

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Nina Chyll
09:11 Mar 10, 2021

I think I’d want to crown the person who called their boat “water u looking at” and not eat them, but sirens, eh? I very much enjoyed the descriptions and found them imaginative and easy to tap into. Someone has already commented on the tense confusion, so I won’t go on about it, either. If I was to pinpoint anything missing from the story, it would be crafting drama or a high point by anticipating it earlier in the plot. The story is pretty linear, a snippet from the life of the sirens, and somehow, their killing the men, which is the cli...

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Cal Carson
17:24 Mar 09, 2021

"Fish hook earrings glimmer, catching the meagre light." Love that sentence but fish hook should be one word and meagre (if you're going for the US spelling) should be meager. "Finished with their game, they swam back to the village. Occasionally, they'd stop to pick the odd piece of seaweed, looping them into bracelets." So far, the story has been in the present tense. "Swam" and "they'd" are past tense. And then, everything changes to past-tense once you get past "Ligei had given birth to a girl, who was healthy enough." Be sure to sti...

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Courtney C
22:52 Mar 09, 2021

Thank you for all of the suggestions! I found them really helpful, and I wish I could have implemented them in time. I find that I can never be objective enough about my own work because it all makes sense in my head ... even when clearly, like you've said, the tenses do slip up. I really appreciate this, and looking forward to reading more of your stories too!

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Cal Carson
00:00 Mar 10, 2021

Yeah, no problem. Wish I had gotten to the story sooner, sorry I was late. I used to have a big problem with tenses too.

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Lemon Lime
05:28 Mar 08, 2021

this is so prettily written! thanks for your comment, and I will read your other stories soon as i can

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Courtney C
06:08 Mar 08, 2021

Thanks so much!

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Courtney C
04:16 Feb 27, 2021

Not my best work, but I kind of just went with it. Planning on going back and doing some revisions, so if you had some feedback, go right ahead.

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Courtney C
23:22 Mar 12, 2021

The irony.

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Rachel Smith
15:28 Mar 09, 2021

Noooooo, I accidentally deleted my post when reading your reply! Oh well, happy writing!

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Rachel Smith
12:49 Mar 13, 2021

Congratulations on getting shortlisted! 😀

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Doria Owen
14:54 Mar 05, 2021

Very descriptive.

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