21 comments

Jan 10, 2021

High School

Melody:

She was kind so I should be able to talk to her. I shouldn’t get nervous or stumble over my words with her.

β€œI like your name. It reminds me of peace for some reason which is odd I know but I just wanted to say your name is pretty.”

β€œCan you help me with this one thing from math? I understand it but not fully so if you don’t mind can you help me?”

β€œDo you remember when we used to talk almost every day?”

β€œHow does it feel to be popular?”

β€œDoes it ever get hard or bothersome to hear your name all the time?”


Kamara:

She was brave and wasn’t afraid of anything except getting into trouble.

β€œHi, Kamara I was wondering if you would get lunch with me.”

β€œDoes it feel good to not be so well known?”

β€œDo you wish you were more like Melody in the sense that she’s popular?”

β€œWhy do you fear getting in trouble? Is it the punishment you're scared of? Is it your parents?”


Ashton:

He was always in somebody’s business and was always around. Trouble seemed to follow him.

β€œHow are you always getting in trouble? Do your parents not care?”

β€œHow does it feel to know that everyone knows your name?”

β€œWere you ever a good kid?”

β€œDo you like getting into trouble? Do you like the punishment behind it? Do you want to be remembered?”

β€œAre you scared of being forgotten?”


Felix:

Felix was Felix or at least that is what everyone says. He was just himself which was always a nice break from everyone pretending to be something else.

β€œI wish I had a personality like yours. How come you aren’t afraid to be yourself?”

β€œWould you say that you still put on an act even while being yourself?”

β€œIs this even your true self?”

β€œAre you in some way appealing to some people which is why you act the way you act?”


Tobias:

He was the smartest kid in school so he should talk to me.

β€œCan you help me with some of the homework?”

β€œDo you feel pressured to be the smart kid?”

β€œWas it ever hard to get the grades you have now?”

β€œWhat was the lowest grade you’ve ever gotten?”

β€œDo you get tired of people asking you for answers?”

β€œAre you tired of having such high expectations put on you?”


Serenity:

She was artsy and always seemed to be fun to talk to.

β€œWhat inspires most of your art?”

β€œDo you actually like art or was it something you do because you’re good at it?”

β€œFavorite thing to do besides art?”

β€œDo you think you’ll ever get anywhere with your creations?”

β€œIf you didn’t do art what would you do?”

β€œDo you feel lost without your art?”

β€œAll of the hobbies in the world and you chose art. Why?”


Elle:

She was kind of like me but more talkative.Β 

β€œEven though you’re somewhat like me, do you fear being an exact copy of me?”

β€œAre you quiet by choice or circumstance?”

β€œWould you ever talk more? If so, how would you do it?”

β€œWould you consider yourself as forgotten?”

β€œHow would you describe yourself?”


Xavier:

He was known by his name nothing more nothing less.

β€œWould you ever consider changing your name? If so, what would your name be?”

β€œWhat would you rather be known for?”

β€œAre you trying to be known for something other than your name?”

β€œDo you like your name?”

β€œHow often does something like this happen?”

β€œHave you ever been known by something else? If so, what was it? Did you prefer being known for that or just your name?”


I wrote everything I wanted to say to people on paper so I wouldn’t forget. Still, with all of this written down, I never seemed to talk much. I’ve always had a lot of questions for people. I’ve always wanted to know more. I was constantly told that β€œCuriosity killed the cat,” but that didn’t stop me from asking a million questions. Something was always interesting to me.

I never actually talked to anyone but I liked having questions to ask. In a way, they were questions to myself rather than to other people. I usually ran the other way when it looked like someone would approach me. If I ever did have a conversation with someone it endly quickly. People would get annoyed with my short answers and walk away. Teachers told me I had to be more vocal and look at people while they spoke.

Eye contact was never really my strong suit. Neither was holding a conversation.

I was the quiet kid everyone would stare at in the halls. I was the smart kid that everyone knew always had the answers somehow. I was a nobody in everybody’s eyes. I was the kid you shouldn’t bother with because it was no use. I was the kid that had a fragile sticker across my forehead. I was to be treated as glass that could break at any moment in time. I was the kid that was easily forgotten in a crowd of people. I was the kid people occasionally messed with. I was the kid that was always there. I didn’t serve a purpose, I just existed.Β 

I wasn’t always like this though. One day everybody changed and I drifted into the shadows.

It was more like I became the shadows but only at school. It was like I had two different parts in a play. At home I was talkative and loud at school I morphed into something else. I didn’t mind playing either of these parts. I rather enjoyed being quiet. I wouldn’t have said that about a year ago but people change. I always feared changing but I was probably the person that had changed the most. It wasn’t my fault though or maybe it was. I ask people questions so I don’t have to answer my own. Well, I don’t ask but still.

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21 comments

This is a very.....weird story any feedback is appreciated🀍 if you're confused (like i said this story is weird) the main character writes questions they have for people down but doesnt ask them because of something that happened (what happened exactly? i dont know) please let me know how you liked it and if there are any critiques that need to be made :)

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Up Voter
19:06 Jan 11, 2021

Fascinating story! The topic and events are really unique!! Let me know if you're being downvoted!!! Have a unique day :) Love, Upvoter

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Up Voter
19:09 Jan 11, 2021

Of course <3

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Veronica Pena
17:52 Jan 11, 2021

awesomeeeeeeeeeee

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Cam Croz
20:19 Jan 10, 2021

very relatable tbh, (I have a feeling most stories from this prompt will be lol). THIs was a vefry interesting and unique read! πŸ˜„ great job! (also I read you bio and like same on the whole jade west thing πŸ™ƒ lmao)

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thank you :) yeah it took me awhile to realize why i liked that scene so much but now i know

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Cam Croz
20:24 Jan 10, 2021

np! lol same, the moment it hit me I was like... oooooooooh tHAtS WHy I LikE JAde...

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Cam Croz
20:27 Jan 10, 2021

lol its just the facts. πŸ˜‚

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!! (ik its on tues but in case i forget ;P) Also, you live in NYC? thats so rad! I live on the west coast and i have never been to new york

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IM SO EXCITED!!!! ive never been to the west coast before (i havent been anywhere actually) the only places ive been to is pennsylvania and new jersey cus its close to new york

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Brooke Hazelip
21:30 Jan 20, 2021

When you're writing a story, it's sometimes ok to leave your reader out of the loop for a bit, but this pushed that envelope for me. As a reader, I was beyond confused. I didn't know if I was reading dialogue, an inner monologue of each named character, etc. I ended up skimming after the third person because I just wanted to make it make sense. To fix this, give the reader a quick heads up and let us know what we are reading. I would have been more interested had I not been so confused. It's the kind of thing that can cause a reader to put d...

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Thank you for the feedback I'll work on that the next time I ever write a story like this!!! The story was basically where the main character writes down the things they want to say to people but they never get the chance because they're a nobody I just didn't know how to write it but really thank you for the feedback

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Brooke Hazelip
23:33 Jan 20, 2021

You did a good job with the theme and the story is very good once you get past the confusion. So don’t feel discouraged and please continue writing!

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Brooke Hazelip
23:33 Jan 20, 2021

You did a good job with the theme and the story is very good once you get past the confusion. So don’t feel discouraged and please continue writing!

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