Falling for the wrong man

Submitted for Contest #74 in response to: Write a story that takes place across ten days.... view prompt

47 comments

Dec 31, 2020

Mystery Suspense Thriller

Kabir. My name is Riddhima. I am Riddhima and as I write this, my hands shiver and my heart pounds. Will I be able to pen down the truth? Will I be able to win over my real enemy ? Will I be able to do that? I loved Kabir( a cop) ; I loved him more than a mother loves her child. I loved him more than a child loves her toys. My love for him was deeper than the roots of a tree and stronger than any love that can ever be. I loved Kabir with all my heart.


Meeting Kabir after the lockdown was one hell of a roller-coaster ride. I felt sad and happy, excited and relieved. But the one emotion that conquered every other emotion was love. We enjoyed my favourite pani-puri and chaat. He even brought me some gajras, my favourite. And then he turned on his serious mode.


'Riddhima? How much do you love me?' his smile bright.

'More than anything in this world, more than I love myself, Kabir.'

'Riddhima, I am about to ask for something big from you. Will you be able to give it to me?' He smiled again, his smile brighter than before.

'Go on and ask. My entire existence is yours,' my eyes stinky from the hot tears now.

'Riddhima, can you for me, be my enemy’s? Can you marry him for my mission, Riddhima?'


When once in Agra I had said that I can sacrifice my life for Kabir, I had definitely meant it. When I had said that he could ask for anything and I would be more than happy to give him anything and everything he asked for, I had meant that too. But this was not what I had meant. My love, my passion for Kabir came with a price so huge. A price no lover would ever have asked his beloved for.


As per the mission, I got married to Vansh Rai Singhania, the biggest business tycoon, and my biggest enemy. As I write this, I really want to scribble and scribble and scribble on this page until there is no space left to write anything about him. I hated him. I hated him more than I hated anyone or anything in my life. Last night, Vansh was being suspicious over me again. He suspects I came into his life as a part of a mission. Hell yeah, I did. He says he hates betrayal and I keep pretending to ignore him, to not pay any heed to his words. But deep down, I care. Deep down, I’m scared.


I set off on my mission right a day after my wedding: that is to say I found a statue on the second day of my stay at the VR mansion. It was a statue of a girl with eyes so big it seemed to steal the stars. On her fingers, she wore the same ring Vansh gifted me on our wedding night, the initials ‘VR’ crystal clear. VR, in case you are wondering is the shorter form of Vansh Rai Singhania. The statue was very creepy, creepy enough to cause the hair on my back rise and make the back of my palms sweat. ‘I hate intriguers’ whispered a deep voice. And in that deadly moment I knew who awaited me. Vansh, Vansh, Vansh, chanted my mind. But my heart roused the slightest speck of hope of finding someone else. On turning around, I saw a pair of coal black eyes staring daggers at me. ‘I hate intriguers,’ repeated Vansh. A small cry escaped my lips but before Vansh could ask anything more, I ran up the stairs, back into my room.


The next day, on enquiring a bit from one of the servants and then a bit from the other, I found out that the statue was of a girl named Rosa. That’s it, I got to know nothing more. My mind started to make a lot of theories.

I)  Rosa, like many others had possibly fallen victim to Vansh.

II)  Rosa was Vansh’s former wife/ girlfriend.

III) Rosa was a spy like me and got killed with her mission incomplete.


That day a very weird thing happened to me. In the evening, I found my bedside table lined with an extremely beautiful bouquet filled with roses of all kinds. There were red and yellow and white. So many of them, and beneath them lied a note.

To,

My sweetheart,  

                          Regards

- - - - -

Well wasn’t that weird? It definitely was. But back when I didn’t know how weird Vansh really was, this act seemed weirder to me.



Soon, I started to fall. On my fourth day in VR mansion, I got shot. While dancing along with Vansh in a masquerade themed party, I felt as if Vansh and I were being looked at. Despite Vansh's tremendous convincing that there wasn't anyone, I went out to check if there really was someone keeping an eye on us. And being the suspicious man that he is, Vansh followed me all along. There was a rustle and a thud. That's all I can remember before I heard Vansh shouting 'Riddhima' as a bullet hit my shoulder and I fell down, into Vansh's arms. ‘That bullet was meant for me,’ he still complains and every time he does, I ignore him. You know, I , myself didn’t know why did I take the bullet on my own self. I didn't, up until a few days ago. You see, when I said I started to fall, I had meant that I started to fall for him. I started to fall for the great business tycoon, Vansh Rai Singhania. I stared to fall for all the things that he was. I started to fall for the good husband that he was. I started to fall for the good boss he was, for the good brother he was. I started to fall for a criminal. I fell for him faster than I fell for Kabir. I fell for him without knowing and mind you, he still taunts me for that.


On my fifth day in the mansion, he warned me again. ‘Riddhima,’ he began. ‘I hate betrayal,’ his back facing towards me. ‘Nobody dares to betray Vansh Rai Singhania. And if someone does, he is never lucky enough to escape. Okay, sweetheart?’

Sweetheart. He uses that word to taunt me.

Wh...why did you kill Rosa?’ I finally managed out some words out of my stuttering mouth.

He shot me one of his looks, raising his left eyebrow up.

Well, well. You have a tongue? Interesting. Very interesting.’

I hate it when he taunts me. Nevertheless, I kept quiet in case he wanted to taunt me some more. He turned around and pinned me up against the bedroom wall.

That’s none of your business and even if it is, you should keep quiet. Shhhh...’ he slowly put up his forefinger on my lips.

For a while, I thought I was drowning. Drowning into his deep eyes as he was drowning in mine. But then suddenly, he broke off. ‘Go and set the breakfast table. Now!’


Everyone in the VR mansion says that Vansh is a riddle no one has ever been able to solve. They say he has multiple faces. So many of them, that Vansh himself might’ve forgotten his real face. My mind wants to believe all that the others say but my heart... My heart screams to not pay attention to anything the others say. So it’s quiet a battle now: a battle between my heart and my mind.


He punished me on the sixth day. As per the rules foretold by him on the night of our wedding, I am not allowed to leave the mansion without Vansh’s permission. Being the stubborn girl that I am, I did quite the opposite. By a lot of efforts, I contacted Kabir and asked him to meet me outside the mansion, just behind the backyard. I told Kabir about the treasure I had found in the VR mansion : the statue. I told him all about the things that occurred while I was away from him. What I did not tell him about was my fall. I didn’t tell him about me falling for Vansh. He instructed me to hand over the slightest proof of Vansh being a criminal to him so that he could use that against Vansh and arrest him. But I didn’t. I made up all the excuses I could to save Vansh. And what did Vansh do? He punished me.


Vansh punished me by locking me up in the attic with no food or water. It was not more than a few moments after Vansh had locked me, that I heard keys jingling. The doorknob rotated and in came Vansh. ‘You really thought I would lock you up in here, did you?’ He smiled and went away. I'd only been up in the attic for a few moments, but in those moments, I hated him.


I locked myself up in the attic for two days. Nobody came to ask for me and to my dismay, neither did Vansh. Maybe he hated me the same way I hated him. Or even more. On the ninth day, I committed another big mistake. I called Kabir from one of the servant’s phone since Vansh had taken away mine. I told Kabir about all the proofs I had gathered against Vansh. I told him about our fight: he locking me and then unlocking me from the attic. I told him about me locking myself up in the attic for two consecutive days. ‘I will come tomorrow to arrest him. Don’t you lose hope, Riddhima.’


On my tenth day in the VR mansion, Kabir, along with his team came to arrest Vansh. He put forth all the evidences I had provided him with. Vansh casted me a sad, brief glance. So he knew. He knew that I had betrayed him once again. He knew it. But I didn’t care.

Mr. Kabir, these allegations are false. All these crimes have been committed by someone else. And the criminal has been arrested too. I cannot believe you thought Mr Vansh over here, is a criminal. I’m totally disappointed in you,’ said the senior officer.


 The entire team left but Kabir didn’t.


I hate you more than I’ve hated anyone in my life, Vansh. I hate you for you snatched away my childhood from me. I hate you for you snatched away my Riddhima from me. I knew it. I knew that you weren’t a criminal but I sent Riddhima after you so that she could prove you wrong. I sent Riddhima so that she could accomplish what my other spies hadn’t been able to. I know you aren’t guilty, Vansh. But I’ll kill you anyway.’


I’ll kill you anyway. I know you’re innocent. I’ll kill you anyway. I know you’re innocent. My head was spinning furiously. And my mind couldn’t really comprehend what my ears had just heard. Vansh was innocent. No, no, no. So my heart had been right throughout? I saw Kabir taking out a gun and before I knew i was standing in between Vansh and Kabir.


Riddhima...’ began Kabir. ‘Move away. Move! ’

He insisted on and on but I didn’t listen to him anyway and then suddenly, there was a thud. I had come in between Vansh and his bullet again. But this time it was different. This time I had been shot right on my heart instead. 

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47 comments

Batool Hussain
19:45 Dec 31, 2020

Hello everyone. A new story after a very, very long time. Sorry for being so inconsistent. I'm hoping to receive the same love you all have been pouring in since the very beginning. Happy new year to all!

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Zilla Babbitt
19:47 Jan 02, 2021

Batool! You're back! I really like this story. It's unique, and you keep getting better with each new one you post. I think the beginning and its descriptions is my favorite part. Keep it up, and glad to have you back!

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Batool Hussain
10:03 Jan 03, 2021

Zilla! Thank you for such sweet words. It really means a lot! How's your 2021 going so far?

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Zilla Babbitt
15:55 Jan 03, 2021

Of course! Pretty good so far, though it's only been three days haha. How about you?

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Batool Hussain
18:42 Jan 03, 2021

It has, thankfully, been good for me too. Can't wait to see what it really has for all of us in store... (smiles nervously)

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Scout Tahoe
16:26 Jan 01, 2021

Batool! You’ve posted! I’m so happy! Wow. This is suspenseful and thrilling and has contradicting emotions. I love it. And I also think it was all Kabir’s fault. Riddhima did nothing wrong. The way you twisted the prompt was lovely. The story was smooth without any bumps. Happy New Year, Toolie. ;)

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Batool Hussain
17:21 Jan 01, 2021

Thank you so much, Scout. Your comment means a lot :)

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Your comeback was much waited Batool. I'm glad you decided to write another story. This one was a great prompt to choose from. I really enjoyed it, and is glad that you are still writing stories. Please continue to write stories! Happy New Years Eve and Happy New Year! :)

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Batool Hussain
06:38 Jan 01, 2021

Thank you so much, Laila. You're so sweet!

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Oh, no problem Batool! :)

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R. K.
20:21 Dec 31, 2020

"with eyes so big it seemed to steal the stars" It's so nice to see that you posted. I know we haven't really conversed prior to your break, but I've always admired your writing and this is no exception. Abi had me excited for this and it did not disappoint. There were a few grammar errors, but nothing that can't easily be fixed or overshadowed the well-executed content. Splendid job. ~ Ru

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Batool Hussain
06:39 Jan 01, 2021

Thanks. And I'm guessing Abi is a shorter name for Abigail? You both are so sweet!

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Maya W.
19:58 Dec 31, 2020

Hey Batool! It's been quite a while! I really enjoyed this story. I felt like I was really reading the scribbled attempts of writing, which is mostly a good thing, but it also sorta confused me at times. Still, I really enjoyed this. The mystery element was unexpected from the beginning but tied well into the end. Nice work! Would you mind checking out some of my more recent stories, now that you're back? And happy new year!

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Jn Park
06:33 Jan 23, 2021

Batoolll you're finally back sorry for being so late:( but I was waiting for your return trust me😉 Great story! Unique setting, character, and descriptions that I always crave for from your stories, and nice plot twist. And I daresay your amazing writing skills are getting better and better; the ending though.... Ahh... Perfect. Two suggestions: One is about the background between Vansh and Riddhima. Why are they enemies and what was the crime at the middle of the issue? (I'm so curiousss) One is about the climax, you can make it more shoc...

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Batool Hussain
13:23 Jan 25, 2021

Thank you. I've always loved your comments. They make me feel SO special. The background between Vansh and Riddhima might be revealed in the future (if and only if we get a suitable prompt). Thank you for your lovely comment, once again:)

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Laura Clark
09:01 Jan 04, 2021

Welcome back Batool! Nice to see you writing again. Lots going on in this one - very fast paced! I enjoyed it though. Looking forward to seeing more of your writing.

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Batool Hussain
09:43 Jan 04, 2021

Thank you, Laura!

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Laura Clark
09:50 Jan 04, 2021

You’re welcome! I’ve got a new one out too, if you’re interested!

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Aaina Aleszezyk
06:35 Jan 04, 2021

In India, There's a soap opera with the same plot and the names of the characters are also same. Is this a coincidence? The name of the soap opera is 'Tere ishq mein marjaawan'.

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Batool Hussain
08:02 Jan 04, 2021

It's not. I've written this story pretty much inspired by that one. If you pay much more attention, I've changed the plot a bit. The girl never took the bullet on her heart, did she?

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Aaina Aleszezyk
09:36 Jan 04, 2021

Okaay!! I don't see soap operas. I just happened to know the basic plot as it's quite famous. When I came across your story I thought it's similar. Anyway all the best and have a great year ahead!!

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Batool Hussain
09:44 Jan 04, 2021

Wishing you a wondeful year too!

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Riddhi S.
03:00 Jan 04, 2021

Lovely story, Batool! PS: Loving the name Riddhima! (It's pretty similar to mine) :D

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Batool Hussain
08:03 Jan 04, 2021

Yayy!!

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Sia Sharma
07:22 Jan 01, 2021

Pure lovely! I just loved the descriptions, the plot, and the way the story flowed! Laila is right, :) your comeback was much awaited. Just beautiful!! Keep writing! -S

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Orenda ♤
05:30 Jan 01, 2021

batool, I'm sooo exultant to have you back and I'm sure everybody else is too. I'm so glad you're here :-) this story was mysterious and the plotline was definitely intriguing and I was hooked from the beginning. I'm going to point out a few errors: --> I can't seem to find that line but you've written "names" instead of "named" somewhere, so be sure to edit that out. --> (I can't find that line xD) you just had to insert some commas. The line was something along the lines of "You know I myself had locked..." so there'll be a comma afte...

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Batool Hussain
06:40 Jan 01, 2021

Thanks Orenda! I corrected the errors. Yeah, this story was in a style different in which I usually write. Glad you liked it!

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Orenda ♤
06:43 Jan 01, 2021

of course!

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Gee Here
19:50 Dec 31, 2020

Yay. I've been waiting for a story from you since so long. This one was as usual so good. The mystery element was well - established. Good job!

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Sammy Xoxoxo
02:14 Feb 24, 2021

i know I'm late, but wow. This story was incredible and very interesting, I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the good workQ

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Izzie Q.
04:00 Feb 22, 2021

Hey Batool! Great story!! I really loved the pacing and detail you kept throughout it! And oh wow, no worries, I'm inconsistent ALL THE TIME! I JUST got back onto reedsy after 5 months (its in my bio) and I'm wondering how you're doing? Whats up ? Hows life been? are you going back to in person school or staying digital?

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Batool Hussain
18:04 Feb 22, 2021

Life's been good. This pandemic is basically kinda part of our lives now. I'm attending school in person nowadays. What about you? How are things at your side?

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Izzie Q.
20:13 Feb 22, 2021

It's been interesting over here!! I live somewhere in Maryland and it's been SNOWING!! But like, the unpleasant kind with all the ice! I've opted to just stay inside for now, don't wanna risk it! It's funny because I've been taking ballet for 7 years but I wouldn't consider myself exceptionally graceful haha Oooh i'm going back to in person school on April 8th but only for Thursdays and Fridays! What's your schedule look like? Are you in all week? How do people ACT? Humanity never ceases to disturb and surprise me haha I'm so curious about w...

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Laiba M
19:34 Feb 20, 2021

Hi, Batool! How are you? We haven't talked in so long T-T how has life been?

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Batool Hussain
18:02 Feb 22, 2021

Life has been okay-ish. What about you?

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Laiba M
18:04 Feb 22, 2021

It's okay-ish for me too :) I finished my last huge exam two days ago, so I have a lot more free time after that! How's school for you?

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14:40 Feb 13, 2021

VAYD. NEW STORY. QUICK

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Izzie Q.
12:41 Feb 13, 2021

hi Batool!! I don't think we've ever chatted before but your. stories. are. AMAZING! you write with such feeling and commitment! i'm really happy to see that you posted again, no worries, I feel inconsistent a lot as well. this story is amazing! the descriptions are amazing and you did a really good job on pacing! Keep it up and I'm super glad to hear from you again :)

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Batool Hussain
18:05 Feb 13, 2021

Awwn, thanks for stopping by. Your comment is much appreciated :)

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Kayla Lane
21:32 Jan 31, 2021

Yes, I'm late, but I don't care! This story was amazing! I loved the way you detailed Riddhima's feelings for Kabir and then Vansh. And the ending left me in shock, because I didn't expect Kabir to shoot her. Good job on this one!

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Batool Hussain
10:18 Feb 06, 2021

Thankuu

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Kayla Lane
20:22 Feb 06, 2021

You're very welcome, Batool!

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01:23 Jan 17, 2021

Hello a very beautiful realistic story with some improvements becomes a TV show .

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Batool Hussain
18:28 Jan 17, 2021

Hi, thanks. Could you point out the parts that need improvements? My main aim was to go for something slightly different than that TV show. Anyways, glad that you got the hint ;)

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07:17 Jan 18, 2021

Hello your story is the same as the story of the Indian series secret agent that is shown in the Arabic channel MBC, the name of the heroine is exactly the same and even the subject of the story with a little difference .

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Batool Hussain
18:12 Jan 18, 2021

Yes, I know. That series is quite intriguing.

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