1195 comments

Oct 27, 2020

Sad Thriller Fantasy

Hi there. I know you. I know you are reading this. I know what you feel.

Β I'm inside you. Oh-oh no, no don't worry. I'm inside everyone. Do you know who I am? I suppose not. Oh well, not everyone is famous, are they?


Come on, try to guess who I am. You know. You know me. And I know you, we have known each other since birth. Yes, since birth. To speak of, everyone knows me. I know everyone.


I go by different names. You see, aliases. So that the good don't get me. But you, you are my favourite.Β You are my best piece of work. My masterpiece.


So, I'll tell you my aliases. You won't tell the good will you? No, because I control you.Β have powers to. Here we go.

DepressionΒ 

Sadness

Anxiety

Peer PressureΒ 

Low self-esteemΒ 

No ConfidenceΒ 

LonelinessΒ 

And all the others.Β 


Honestly, Depression and Anxiety are my favourite. It's so fun to make people cry. Shut themselves. Isolate themselves.Β Make them feel bad. Like they're worth nothing. Hehe. You'll understand later. Oh and the best part is when they give up on you.Β Hehe.


But you fought. Why? Why did you fight against me? You knew I'd win. I am made to win.Β 


I met you first when you were Five. Yes, the day your mom died. That was fun. For me. I had a good feast. You shut up. You cried. Cried your heart out. In your pillow. You wept day and night. I actually felt sad for once. Yes. Me. It is sad to see a Five year old cry. Maybe the good finally found me. But then I laughed. At your foolishness.Β 


I kept on whispering. In your ears. That she's gone. You'll never see her. She's dead. She didn't say goodbye. She didn't come in your dreams. She did nothing.Β 


You heard me. But shut me out. Bad move. You ignored this for a year. Two. Four years. Then it flooded back to you. That she's freakin' dead. She will NEVER EVER come back. You turned 10. You learnt that your dad was smoking. He couldn't bear the loss. He went with his friends. Out. Everyday. Came back at 2 o'clock.Β 


That's how you went into depression at 10 years of age. You had panic attacks. Your dad couldn't do anything. He passes out on the sofa. You lay there. Frozen. White foam coming out of your mouth.Β You lay there for a day. Then the maid came, and she saw you twitching your mouth in all directions.Β 


She took you to the hospital and admitted you. She was a nice lady.Β But your dad, he didn't even apologize for not being there. So, you went into a coma. For 3 years.


You came out. At 14. Smoking took a toll on your dad. He had a heart attack. And, well, he too died. But this time you didn't cry. You didn't care. He was nothing to you. Not after what happened to mom. He didn't care about her. He didn't care about you. All he cared was for himself.Β Β 


So, you went boarding. A very bad place. You entered "Your room" and saw a moth-eaten bedsheet on a disgusting bed with cigarette burns all over the bedsheets. The walls were rotting and the Mirror was covered with mold and black spots.Β 


And according to Murphy's Law. "If something can go wrong, it will."Β 

So, New rotten school = New rotten bully. Yeah. You got bullied, hurt because of this Noah kid. Good bully.Β 


You see, I live in The Suddesion. Pain and Regret, my two assistants guard the door of Suddesion. The Suddesion is a universe.Β As you guess, it isΒ made up of Sadness and Depression. In your words " a black hole of sadness".Β 


I grow more as you become more sad. I also emit sadness through bullies, bad luck, and other things. Then there are Stunbees. Yes, these Stunbees sting you. When they do. They stun you really bad. They are like animated creatures. They have long violent zig-zag shaped stripes. These stripes sting you.Β 


For example, you have met a stunbee before. Everyone has. Like if you failed an exam, or got fired, or just got to know that your crush likes your friend. They always travel in threes.Β 


A Year Later… 


You stand at your Mother's grave thinking of your past. You are 15 now. Noah is in a mental asylum. His brain became distorted.Β It's your birthday today. But no one remembers. Then you hear a shuffle of feet. It's Noah. With a gun.Β Your head spin around, your vision is blurred and as you see the smile on his face widen you scream: "BOOM LIFE! I DIDN'T KILL MYSELF. ALL MY LIFE I FOUGHT THROUGH!"


Click, Click.Β 

Shot.Β 

You're dead.

On your birthday.Β 

Happy Birthday



Author’s note: This story was a little short so this note is gonna be long. Ignore if wanted. So um….. this is sad. Very sad. Sorry! 😬😬


And also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY RHONDA!!!!Β Β 

Now for the annoying part.Β 

Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah BlahΒ 

Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Ugh Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah UghΒ BlahΒ Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah BlahΒ Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Ugh Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Ugh Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah BlahΒ 



Find the Four "Ugh" loll I'm soo annoying. Bye!!!!Β 


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1195 comments

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Amazing. You were able to combine a (unique) dry humor with dark themes. My only critique is that sometimes, you do need to power through writer's block. Sometimes, it hurts. But you have to push through it to get out of it. Mix it up, write something new. Anything to get out of it!

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Radhika Diksha
10:23 Jan 14, 2021

Look beautiful and gorgeous. I saw your photo yesterday. Happy Makar sankranti. And don't get bothered by any boy or down voter. Be strong.

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Aww, thanks a TONN Radhika! Happy Makar Sankranti!! I wish the same for you :)

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Amaya .
21:14 Jan 13, 2021

aww omg you're so pretty whattt no fairr lmaooo you're gorgeous no cap

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Awww <<33333 SHANKSSS lmaoooo I look ugly when u meet me lmaooo

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Amaya .
18:08 Jan 14, 2021

DLFHSDK no i doubt itt

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Amaya .
03:00 Jan 15, 2021

<333333

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17:56 Jan 12, 2021

No very funny tho..... D: Sorry..... D:

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Yeah..... sorry about that. I guess I was kinda trying to take ppls mind off the DV.

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18:00 Jan 12, 2021

DV? It’s okieeeee

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Down-voter, *sighs in relief*

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18:03 Jan 12, 2021

Ohhhhhhh *:D*

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Amaya .
02:30 Jan 12, 2021

Hey how are you Sia? Checking up on you I hope you're well.

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Aw, gee, thanks Amaya! Yeah, I'm doing good, how about you?

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Amaya .
04:20 Jan 12, 2021

Ofc! aw thats great, im well too!

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:), thats good! Soo whats up?

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Amaya .
04:48 Jan 12, 2021

not much! what about you? sorry ik this is the most boring answer but my life rly is boring lol

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Not much either, just drowning to death in hw. Lol, I feel u sis

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Aw, gee, thanks Amaya! Yeah, I'm doing good, how about you?

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Orenda .
18:33 Jan 05, 2021

heylo, my story's out. Feel free to check it out whenever you want. Drop some feedback too!

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Orenda .
15:24 Dec 26, 2020

Oh my Sia, I hope you're doing alright :D

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Orenda .
17:41 Dec 26, 2020

Aw, what's the issue if you don't mind me asking?

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Idk, it's just like I feel like a piece of shit, etc. Plus loads of ppl are also leaving. Soooo yeah.

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Orenda .
19:28 Dec 26, 2020

I think you're a beautiful piece of shit. Just what I was feeling, so take your time. Take care <3

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X) thankss ugh yas. I've been trying to write it out bit I cant cuz I got block.

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X) thankss ugh yas. I've been trying to write it out bit I cant cuz I got block.

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Ackkkk I LOVE THIS!!!!! Absurdly creativeβ€”you have an amazing story AND the way you tell it is amazing. Like, the narrator and second-person? LOVE IT!!! Super-sad but, y’know, some of the best stories all. The end lines are genius. And gosh, I feel bad for this girl. Terrific job!’!

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Orenda .
17:41 Dec 10, 2020

hey, I've a new story out. Mind reading and sharing your valuable feedback on it? Thanks a lot :))

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B. W.
18:55 Dec 09, 2020

heyyy

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B. W.
04:14 Dec 10, 2020

how are ya?

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B. W.
18:48 Dec 10, 2020

Im fine but just really bored and tired

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I'm crying, but it was so powerful throughout the next ten years of her life.

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Um, could you elaborate? I'm sorry, I didn't understand what you are trying to say

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Sorry I was in the car and my brother was trying to slap me (for some irrelevant reason). What I was trying to say was how I like how you wrote without that much dialogue, and how placed in a 3rd person, 2nd person-ish view. It takes a lot to make me cry but this story was a top notch story that I would read again.

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Ohh lol, (my little sis hit me with her shoe on my bday) Aww thanks so much! This made my day :) Ps. Wonderful name!!

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Hahah a shoe lol Thanks came up with the name randomly TvT

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B. W.
20:00 Dec 07, 2020

Could ya check out "To catch a killer" and then leave some feedback?

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B. W.
03:32 Dec 08, 2020

thanks ^^

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Zea Bowman
16:35 Dec 03, 2020

Hey Sia! Zea again. Just stopped by to say I made yet another story...sort of like "Zombies Sound Safer Than My Family." Might be one of the last ones, so if you come to check it out and let me know what you think, that'd be super cool. If not, it's all good. Just letting ya know :)

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Zea Bowman
16:35 Dec 03, 2020

Hey Sia! Zea again. Just stopped by to say I made yet another story...sort of like "Zombies Sound Safer Than My Family." Might be one of the last ones, so if you come to check it out and let me know what you think, that'd be super cool. If not, it's all good. Just letting ya know :)

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Sam S.
15:53 Dec 03, 2020

Hello Sia! I'd never checked out your stories before, I don't know why though. I saw that you'd followed me and came over here. The first thing I checked was your bio; but it was kinda empty and umm....you're sad? Anyway, about the story....it was so creative and to depict depression and all those sad stuff as a person requires true talent and you certainly have the potential. I really like the way you write and the last part, I didn't see that coming lol So, again, why're you feeling so sad? Btw, I've posted a new story today. I...

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Hi! Um, Yes, thanks for the concern! I feel a lot better now, it was mainly school stress :) Thanks!!! Ohh lovely sure!!

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Sam S.
03:18 Dec 04, 2020

Oh okay! Happy to hear that you're fine now :)

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Kate M
14:07 Dec 01, 2020

I loved this story. It was very sad, but I appreciated it. It was interesting how it was written from Depression and Anxiety’s perspectiveβ€”I liked that! Especially now β€œGood” was also a character, and how Depression and Anxiety shied away from it. I think this is a very real depiction of how β€œhe” can work his way into your mind and whisper in your ear. Also, thanks for following me! ❀️

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Wow! Thanks a lot for this heartful comment! ❀ I appreciate the time taken!! :D

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B. W.
05:32 Dec 01, 2020

Could you check out "Unforgivable" and leave some feedback?

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B. W.
06:29 Dec 01, 2020

alright thanks, im a bit excited to see what ya think ^^

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B. W.
07:20 Dec 01, 2020

I hope ya like it though, i was kinda thinking that people wouldnt like it

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Hey, Sia!!! Would you mind checking out my new story?? Thx!

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B. W.
21:16 Nov 29, 2020

Heyyy

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B. W.
05:46 Nov 30, 2020

how are ya?

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B. W.
18:39 Nov 30, 2020

whats wrong?

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