85 comments

Oct 13, 2020

Science Fiction Thriller Drama

By the time I stepped outside of my house, the leaves were on fire. Literally. It was so, super hot. The whole reason I even had to step outside was to get a break from that stupid party of my sister’s.


She got into Oxford. So what? It doesn’t mean that you should get a whole party! (Alright fine, maybe she does deserve it, but still!)


Mark my words, I’m going to be even better than her. I’m going to be one of the first astronauts to get into The Skeld, the first spaceship to Mars. Humanity has been so careless of their surroundings. I remembered something my history teacher had taught me in class, about the ice caps.


They melted thirty years ago, which made Earth so hot. I blame it all on my dad and grandfather. It’s their generations’ fault that this even happened!


I ran into Candlewood Forest, thinking it would help me cool down. Weak twigs snapped with each step of mine, and the wind whistled in my ears.


I reached a spot in the woods looking up to the night sky. I could see the moon playing hide-and-seek, hiding within the cottony clouds. A shooting star shot through the night, casting a long, fiery tail behind it as it entered the atmosphere.


Wait for what.


Shooting stars didn’t enter the atmosphere. This meant that thing was something else. It came closer and closer towards me, before crashing into a place a few hundred meters ahead of me.


The first sounds I heard after that was the sound of trees creaking and breaking down. Then the extraterrestrial object crashed and bounced towards me. I heaved myself out of the way at the last second.


The object stopped a few seconds later, leaving a flaming mess behind it.


It looked like a futuristic shoe, with a black background and purple highlights. It was giving off smoke at the rear, where I thought the engines would be.


My brain told me to go closer and explore it, while my instincts told me to hide. I chose my instincts.


I ran, keeping about fifty feet between me and the ship, before hiding behind a tree. A hatch started to open at the top of the rocket.


Out climbed a scary looking ... thing. An alien


It had horns running from the forehead, curving and twisting until reaching an end at the top. Its mouth was bared, showing fangs as long as my hand. It ran on four legs like a monkey, mainly using its hind ones for pushing and front ones for support.


Four more aliens trailed after it, one looking even more menacing than the first.


They gathered around the hatch and “communicated” by which I mean they growled at each other for about five minutes.


Suddenly, a figure stumbled through the woods and straight into the clearing the aliens were in.


It was a man, from what the silhouette looked like. He took one glance at the creatures and shrieked. He turned around and ran through the forest, occasionally tripping over the roots of trees.


One of the aliens tore through the woods, in search of the man who had intruded the scene. It came back nearly two minutes later, clutching the corpse of the man. He presented it to its friends and threw it on the ground.


The biggest alien, the Alpha, as I call it, crawled towards it. It studied the body closely, and abruptly tore off the head. I’m glad it was night time, it would’ve been horrible to witness all this. 


The alien stared into those lifeless eyes and promptly gulped it down. A strange change happened inside the Alpha’s body. It seemed as if it was vibrating. A ripping sound came, and the alien split into two halves. Out came the body of the dead man. Or was it the dead man?


The corpse was still lying upon the ground. The “man” must be something else. Maybe it was the alien itself! 


They’re shapeshifters!


I stepped back, and in doing so, the aliens’ heads shot towards my direction. But before they could do anything, a loud “BEEP!” sounded, and the creatures ran pell-mell into the woods. Perhaps it just came from a car nearby.


I waited for five whole minutes to make sure they were gone.


Then I ran. Ran for my life, my future, and my dreams.


5 years later


Finally. I’m aboard the Skeld. The spaceship of your dreams. Not really though, because ever since the alien threat, every mission has been dangerous. They could morph into humans and act as Skeld crewmates.


That’s why the trips are so dangerous. No one knows who’s an impostor or a crewmate. Anyone can kill you. As Mad-Eye Moody says, we need, “CONSTANT VIGILANCE!”


As for the ventilation system, it’s useless. Scientists have figured out that the alien, or Covens as we now call them, give off toxic chemicals from their body. Since there have been eyewitness accounts, we know the Covens have been in the vents. So it’s a no-go.


Of course, other Covens can enter the vents, since the chemical isn’t lethal to them.


I put on my helmet and walked into the docking ship. It would take us to the Skeld, which was too big to be launched from the ground.


As I waited, others began to enter the ship. I don’t know their names, just their colors. I’m Cyan, by the way. In came Red, Black, White, Yellow, Pink, and Green. I didn’t talk to any of them, because I didn’t know who I could trust.


We each had a task upon the Skeld, and we could only start the journey to Mars after each of us has completed it.


 Why?


Because every time the Skeld comes back, it needs servicing. The hatch closed behind us and off we went. It took us ten minutes to reach, and once we were there, everyone left without a word.


I checked my tablet to see what my tasks were. Okay, I have to go to Electrical and fix up the wiring. No big deal. Just the threat of death lurking over your life every time you see someone.


I went there and saw Red and White doing their “tasks.” I stayed far from both of them, doing my job silently, It was simple, just attaching color-coded wires.


Soon after, I decided to go to Admin to check the cameras. Unfortunately, they only show black and white, so I can’t differentiate between colors. I checked each and every one. No suspicious behavior.


I turned them off and left the room, checking my tablet for my next task: Divert Power to O2.


Sounds easy enough. But it is also dangerous. I decided to take a shortcut through the cafeteria, doing my other task which was to empty the garbage. Suddenly, as I was walking towards it, the cafeteria doors shut with a bang.


I was startled out of my wits and looked around quickly and cautiously to see if there was anyone else with me.


There was.


Yellow. Standing right in front of me, banging on the door, was Yellow. He looked at me and backed away, his body shaking in fear. I didn’t go near him, just in case, he thought I was a Coven/Impostor.


I just quietly waited for the doors to open. During the elapsed time I finished taking out the garbage AKA throwing it away into space. 


Once the gates finally opened, I was back on my way to Electrical. Once I reached, I saw Red coming out and going towards the right engine. He hadn’t seen me.


Only that prepared me for the sight I was about to see inside.


It was Yellow’s body, cut cleanly in half, only leaving a single bone in the middle. Blood oozed out in all directions.

I gaped at her body for a long moment, before pulling out my tablet and hitting “Report Body.” A chat box popped into view. It was meant to discuss who the Coven was. There was also a voting window beneath it.


I saw that particular window and skimmed it. None were dead but Yellow, who had a large, red “X” on top of her. I went back to the discussion:


Red: Where?


Me: In electrical. I saw you coming out of it.


Red: I swear I did not do it!


White: I was in the cafeteria. Green was there with me.


Green: I was.


Me: VOTE RED EVERYONE! HE KILLED YELLOW!


Cyan has voted

White has voted


Red: I didn’t do it!


Green has voted

Pink has voted

Black has voted


I glanced back into the voting window. Yup. Red’s had the most votes. That means he gets ejected. The Skeld has special trap doors that open to space. They can detect the color that was voted out, and eject them.


Well, hopefully, Red was an Impostor. And hopefully, we’ll all just be safe. 


I spent the rest of my time finishing off my tasks, and when I had nothing to do, I just checked the security cameras every now and then.


I was walking around near O2, checking for any more suspicious activity when I saw White following me closely. I took one glance at her and ran for my life.


Everything went past me in a blur, and I soon found myself face to face with a door. The door that led to the cafeteria. I turned my head around to see White standing in front of me. She walked closer, and I was leaning and pounding on the door.


Suddenly, it opened, and I fell flat on my face, maybe even breaking my nose. I got up and sprinted over to the middle table.


It had a red button on it, and I clicked it. That called for an emergency meeting.


Green: What happened?


Me: White was acting suspiciously. Kept on following me.


White: I was just following you to see if you were acting sus!


Me: It looked pretty shady to me though. I think she was ghosting me to kill me. She could be a Coven.


Green: Yeah, you’re right.


White: I am not a Coven! I think you’re an impostor Cyan.


Me: She’s turning the tables on me! More proof! Vote White!

Cyan has voted

White has voted

Black has voted

Green has voted

Pink has voted


I looked at the voting window to see the results. White had four votes. I had one. White had voted for me, probably trying to frame me.


So now White, Red, and Yellow are gone. There’s a big chance one of them was a Coven. Hopefully.


I was scouting the remaining people, searching for suspicious activity, when the reactor had a meltdown. Everyone rushed to it to fix it, but one arrived late. Green. I regarded this as suspicious behavior and proceeded to stalk him.


I followed him everywhere, into Admin, into Navigations, and even O2. He was trying hard to shake me off his tail, but I managed to stay on him.


But when we entered Admin, he suddenly turned on his heel and ran off at top speed. I decided that publicly following Green was unwise, and I searched for him again.


In about five to ten minutes, I found him back into Admin. I peered around the door and saw him standing on top of the vent. He looked around and pulled out the screws. He lifted the hatch and slid inside.


He’s the Impostor among us!


This fact made me happy, and sad at the same time. Happy, because I could finally save the survivors. Sad, because of the two innocent lives that were taken away by me.


I gathered my wits and ran silently to the cafeteria. I pressed the red button once more. Before looking at the discussion page, I scanned the one which listed all the people on board.


The system is connected with a special badge that is on everyone’s spacesuit. It read their vital signs and told the computer who’s dead and who’s not.


Pink was dead. The only other crewmate left was Black. I quickly went back to the discussion.


Black: Pink’s dead.


Green: Yeah

Me: You should know Green, after all, you killed him.


Black: Really?


Green: No! I think you or Black did it, Cyan.


Me: I saw Green run into Admin and vent. I was following him and I saw him slither into it.


Black: I’m not sure who to trust …


Green: Trust me. Cyan is framing me. Look how many innocent crewmates he voted off. He must be the Coven.


Me: Black, ignore Green. Listen, this can be one of the most important moments of your whole life. If we let Green get into the Mars colony, a whole bunch of people will die. Trust me, please.


Black: Green’s got a point Cyan, you did vote off a bunch of people.


Me: I made mistakes. I was paranoid. People make mistakes all the time. But do you want those people to die in vain? Pink, Red, and White?


Black: No …


Me: Then vote Green. Please trust me, just this once.


Black: Okay. But if Green’s innocent, you’ll have me to answer to.


Cyan has voted


Green: Look, Black. You gotta trust me, ‘kay? I did not kill those people. Cyan did.


Black: I trust Cyan. Die, you filthy Coven!


Black has voted

Green has voted

Green was ejected


Finally. The impostor was gone. All was well.


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85 comments

09:30 Oct 13, 2020

1. This is my longest story yet! 2,000 words! And it only took me 3 days. 2. This story is based on the game "Among Us." It's really cool, and you can download it on your phone for free! 3. I added my own backstory for why the impostor's kill and why you're on a spaceship the first place. 4. Rate this on a scale of 10! 5. Please point out any mistakes. Thanks! Lastly, thank you for reading! Give me a follow if you like my stories, I recently got 400! Thank you for the support! Cheers! :D

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Harley Quinn
09:43 Jan 12, 2021

I give u 11\10

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Zea Bowman
02:39 Oct 23, 2020

Woah...totally got the Among Us vibe. I felt like I was playing the game. The only thing I was a bit disappointed about was that they won: Yay! I won! Happy ending! Meh. Honestly, it might just be me, but I felt like everything Cyan did would have gotten him (or her) voted out if this were a real Among Us game. However, from an author's point of view, this had a really good theme to the story, and a nicely brought together (I call myself an author??? I don't know, that sentence just didn't sound right lol. Back to it) ending. Overall...

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03:00 Oct 23, 2020

Thank you! Yeah, it would have, but he did a good job of making everyone believe that other people were impostors. In a real Among Us game, all you do is spam "(Color) is the impostor!" Thanks again!

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Zea Bowman
15:44 Oct 23, 2020

No problem! I really do enjoy reading your stories.

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16:04 Oct 23, 2020

:)

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Amany Sayed
17:06 Oct 15, 2020

Hehe I saw the title and immediately read cause I love the game. Anyway, it was a really cool story and well written. I actually was thinking of making a story based on the game the other day. Keep writing!

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17:15 Oct 15, 2020

Thank you! Even I do, I played a few games with my cousin today, super fun!

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Wolfy 🐺
22:59 Oct 21, 2020

Yes same! I loved this story just like I love the game! 😁👍

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Charles Stucker
14:55 Oct 15, 2020

Out climbed the scariest looking alien I had ever seen.- so he's seen a lot of aliens? No one knows whose an - who's or who is This reminds me of the John Campbell short, "Who Goes There?" It also featured shapeshifting aliens. If I were a shapeshifter on the spaceship, I would kill nobody. Just wait for Mars and live there. But that wouldn't make much of a story. This is a little spotty, with the initial scene in the woods. Then, the "main" story progressed so quickly and everyone was just a color with nothing to distinguish them, th...

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15:08 Oct 15, 2020

Thanks for your precious critique! I’ll edit that. That too. I don’t think I can do that in a day, but it’s a very good idea! I based this off the game Among Us and there’s no part in which they actually land. But I might have write one, if a prompt is good. :

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Zilla Babbitt
02:01 Oct 23, 2020

Here I am, very late (sorry!). This is so interesting. I like the spaceship scene, that was well-written and intriguing. Your world was nicely developed. So was Cyan the imposter after all? I think so :) I suggest, actually, that you only have the spaceship scene. This would mean you'd have to delete a sizeable section, but I think the first scene detracts from the powerful part, the spaceship. Plus, the second half is written more professionally in my opinion, while the first is a little too childish-ly phrased. I'll give this a hard...

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03:04 Oct 23, 2020

Thanks a lot! I think I need the woods scene because I feel that answers the question of "How are there impostors in the first place? I think that if I answered that question in the spaceship part, there would be too much exposition. And I need to start off with the prompt anyways! 😂 Thanks for your honest review!

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Raymond Kelly
14:22 Oct 21, 2020

Interesting concept. I really felt like I was playing a game of among us. You caught the suspicious vibe of the game. Your writing style is very good, as I don't notice it at all and am instead drawn forward by the plot. I don't particularly like the beginning segment, but I'm glad there was one, because otherwise just doing the game part would be boring. 8/10, I think if you improved on the beginning (making it more character driven) and maybe had the caracter form some sort of relationship or bond with any other character, as opposed to ju...

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14:58 Oct 21, 2020

Thank you! Thanks for your advice, I’ll keep it in mind :)

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04:52 Oct 22, 2020

This was your 999th comment, lol!!!!

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05:07 Oct 22, 2020

This is my 1001st comment. My 1000th comment is on Warwick House (Zilla)

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05:28 Oct 22, 2020

Ohh nice! 8read Warwick house, its AWESOME!

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06:08 Oct 22, 2020

Yup!

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Princemark Okibe
11:30 Oct 18, 2020

From this story, I can see you love the environment so much.

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13:03 Oct 18, 2020

Yes!

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Keerththan 😀
04:43 Oct 15, 2020

That was a wonderful story. I know this is really a game. But, it was creative of you to use it to the story. I enjoyed reading it. If you have editing time.... 1)I’m glad it was night time, it would’ve been horrible to witness all this. I was glad it was night time. The whole story is in past tense. 2)The spaceship of your dreams. I think its "my dreams." I also guess you started it as a 2nd pov and changed it to 1st pov. I am not sure. 3)I’m Cyan, by the way. I was Cyan. These are the things I found out if you still have ...

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05:05 Oct 15, 2020

Thank you! 1. I think the original one makes sense, as in it feels like past tense. 2. I was kind of imagining it that the main character is telling his children, although I didn't really mention that in the story. 3. I'll change that, thanks for pointing it out! I'll read it later! :)

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Keerththan 😀
05:09 Oct 15, 2020

Welcome! 1)okay 2) Yeah, then finally write that part in present tense. Like his grandchildren are exclaiming," Yeah, the imposter got ejected." That makes more sense. But anyways its your choice. 3) Welcome! Okay!

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05:15 Oct 15, 2020

2. No, I don't think I'll change it. :)

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Keerththan 😀
05:17 Oct 15, 2020

Okay!

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14:32 Oct 14, 2020

I rate this a 7. Once the story got going, it was good. Interesting plot, with good control of tension and flow. The dialogue is realistic sounding, and immerses the reader. The only mistake I saw was that the beginning didn't tie in well with the rest of the story. It seemed like you wrote two different stories, using one to tie the rest to the prompt given. For example, to tie in the prompt, you could start with. "By the time I stepped outside, the leaves were on fire. How sad that we had to launch in fall. All our time was ...

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15:12 Oct 14, 2020

Thanks for the critique! I appreciate it :) I won’t be changing the first part though, the readers need to know what the Covens are, and need more information about them. You’re welcome!

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15:45 Oct 14, 2020

Yes, I can see where you're coming from. :)

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Sarah 💜🌸
00:10 Oct 14, 2020

Oh, I liked how you took Among Us and made it a story. Great job. Also, I rate this story a solid 8. The pacing was kinda weird at times but that's it.

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03:13 Oct 14, 2020

Thank you!

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Sarah 💜🌸
00:01 Oct 14, 2020

Ok, so I haven't read the story yet but AMONG US! WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Red: Where was the body? Pink: Admin, I saw it when I went to do a task Lime: I was with white. We were in electrical. Red: I left cyan for a moment, and now he's dead. The only one who was in admin was purple. Purple: Yea but I left earlier Black: Idk, purple kinda sus ngl Purple: SAYS THE PERSON WHO DIDN"T DO KEYS Red: Just vote purple Purple: No black White: Guys let's just skip... Green was not an imposter...

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03:13 Oct 14, 2020

:D

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Rambling Beth
13:02 Oct 13, 2020

I love Among Us, and this concept was so interesting! I did think that the main character was going to be the imposter, so I was pleasantly surprised when they weren't. Nice take on the prompt. :)

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13:08 Oct 13, 2020

Thank you!

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11:19 Oct 13, 2020

Nice!! I really liked the concept!! Honestly, I expected a plot twist but you surprised me !!!

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12:01 Oct 13, 2020

Thank you!

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Harley Quinn
09:48 Jan 12, 2021

I mean wow I'm writing a story on the game but then I needed inspiration I mean your story gave me lots of it.... it is really cool...btw, akshat ave you played among us irl.. I ave and it is fun you can watch on YouTube from the channel shiloh and bros or troom troom and stuff

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Megan Sutherland
01:12 Dec 20, 2020

Hey, Akshat! I don't really know you and you don't really know me. But I was bored and scrolling through the leaderboard, so I decided to come check you out. I LOVE THE GAME AMONG US. I play with my friends all the time!!! I loved your backstory on the impostors. Super creative! I hope we can become better Reedsy Friends! You asked for a rate: assuming 10 is the best, I'll say 10/10. :D Let me know if there are any other stories of yours you'd want me to check out! -Megan S.

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07:49 Dec 20, 2020

Whoawhoawhoa, I do know you! Remember your story about the wolves? And that one of the wolves’s sister came and said that your son is dangerous? That was amazing! Anyway, thank you! And of course, we are friends! You can check out anything you want! Thanks again!

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Megan Sutherland
12:03 Dec 20, 2020

I remember you reading that now :D Okay! It might be a while until you hear from me, because I am going to visit family for a few days and I won't be able to come online that much.

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13:52 Dec 20, 2020

No problem! Have fun! :D

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Deleted Account
14:48 Nov 26, 2020

I loved the story! The mad eyed moody quote is what really got me, tho. The plot was great, and it was really well written! 10/10

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16:19 Nov 26, 2020

Thank you so much, Felicity!

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B. W.
22:09 Nov 03, 2020

Heya ^^ I think ive already checked this out a while ago when ya still had your Halloween name and stuff, but just in case ill give It a 10/10 again ^^ I also hope this isn't bothering you or anything, but i made a new story a little while ago called "Saving a friend" and i was wondering if you could maybe leave some critique/feedback on it?

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11:45 Nov 04, 2020

Thanks again! I will!

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B. W.
16:16 Nov 04, 2020

thanks ^^

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E. Jude
11:11 Oct 25, 2020

Love this! Love the game Among us! Well done! I would love it if you could check out my stories too!!! XElsa

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12:19 Oct 25, 2020

Thank you! I will soon, I'm watching a movie right now. Remind me :)

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Echo Sundar
16:22 Oct 20, 2020

So im sorry if my comment seemed rude this story is absolutley amazing I love how it went form sisters party to finding aliens in the woods to going on space ship. amazing writing technique!

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03:10 Oct 21, 2020

Thank you so much! No, it wasn't rude!

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Echo Sundar
16:20 Oct 20, 2020

So I really like this story, it was really fun to read, and I know its called among us but it seemed like you were just writing about some thing that allready existed, then again i mean its sort of like a fan fic, so never mind good job!

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03:10 Oct 21, 2020

Thank you!

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