True Love

Submitted for Contest #50 in response to: Write a story about a proposal. ... view prompt

29 comments

Jul 13, 2020

Romance


“How do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Be so adorable without even trying?”Miles pushed his glasses up his nose and pushed his hair out of his face. It was no use though, and his hair fell back into his eyes seconds later. He frowned.

“You did it again! Unless you did that on purpose?”

“What! What did I do, push my hair out of my face? Not that it even worked…”

“I don’t believe this….It really is effortless then.”Miles blushed and turned away.

“Seriously, what did I do?”

“I can’t explain it. Just keep doing what you’re doing. I am the luckiest girl in the world.” Miles took off his glasses. They were beginning to give him a headache. He then tried again to unsuccessfully get his hair out of his face.He gave a groan of annoyance.

“What, what’s wrong Miles?”Phoebe turned to her boyfriend, and was surprised to see him with his glasses off. She had never in their 2 years of dating seen him without the thick lens that always obscured his face.

“Nothing...It’s just my hair! It won’t get out of my face!I think I’m cutting it tomorrow”Phoebe shook her head, laughing. 

“First of all, never cut your hair, it’s one of your best physical attributes. Second of all, your eyes are so….so…..”

“What, I know they probably look weird without my glasses,”Miles said, reaching to put them back on his face.

“No! They’re such a bright blue! I never noticed.”Phoebe said, putting a hand on his wrist to stop him.

“Stop!”

“Stop what?”

“Complimenting me!”

“Hmmmmmm, no.”Phoebe said, and thought hard about what she should say next. “You are a literal genius, you know that?” Miles shook his head and looked through the window into the almost full moon. The glint of light only brightened his eyes.

“My turn. Your smile, your laugh, your perfect way too kind heart and the way you do everything with a purpose. Those are some of my favorite attributes of yours.”Phoebe blushed and smiled. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

***

It was on that day that Miles knew he was going to spend the rest of his life with Phoebe. 

The question was, how? He needed a ring. Perhaps a tux, and roses, she loved roses. 

All the while, Phoebe fell more and more in love with Miles, loving everything about him, from the dimple in his cheek to the way he spoke, always with his hands. 

Eventually he found the perfect ring. He bought it. 

***

“Phoebe”Miles said, his voice practically shaking with his nervousness. 

“Yeah?”she replied, looking up from her book. They were in a hotel room. They were sightseeing in California.

“Wanna go to that little diner at the edge of the town? That one we passed by that you said you wanted to go to?Wanna go right now?”

“Really?! Sure, I’ll go get ready!”Phoebe said, going over to the small drawers. She picked out an orange summer dress. Miles decided on a white dress shirt with his black pants. He carefully tucked the ring inside his pocket and walked out of the hotel room, holding the door open for Phoebe. They decided to walk in comfortable silence to the diner. 

In his mind, Miles practiced what he would say. 

They arrived about ten minutes later to the diner. It wasn’t very far. They paid for seats and sat down. Miles pushed his glasses up his nose.

Phoebe picked up one of the menus and started to read aloud to Miles.

“Okay, so, do you want the tomato soup, the chicken parmesan, the pasta, ooh that sounds good, it has a homemade pesto in it, how about we share a plate?”Miles smiled.

“Sure, whatever you want,” he said. He didn’t know if he could really eat anyway. A waiter came to collect their order.

“Hello, welcome to the Cali Style Diner, what can I get ya?”the kind woman asked, notepad and pen at the ready.

“Hi, we’d like 1 large plate of the Pesto Pasta please.”

“Alright. Any drinks?”

“Ummm, Miles do you want anything?”

“No, just water is fine.”he said.

“Okay, so two waters, one large Pesto Pasta with two forks. It’ll probably be a ten minute wait. Someone will come to give you bread shortly.”The waiter walked away. A couple minutes later, someone came and put a basket of bread in the middle of their table. 

Miles absentmindedly chewed on one while he thought. Should he wait until after they eat?

“Miles!MIles, helooooo?”Phoebe tapped Miles on the shoulder. He almost jumped.

“Oh, sorry, I was lost in thought. “Miles said. He rubbed the ring in his pocket. 

“Here you go, enjoy!”a waiter said, moving aside the bread basket to put a large plate of pasta on the table.”Phoebe started eating.

“This is delicious!”she said. She looked into his eyes, blocked slightly by his glasses. Something was bothering him , she could see that.”Are those glasses giving you a headache again? I’m telling you, you have to wear contacts!”Phoebe said. Miles took his glasses off. They were giving him a headache, which wasn’t helping the butterflies in his stomach. 

“You know I could never get contacts! Besides, there aren’t contacts that fit my prescription.”

“Well at least get new glasses that put less pressure on your nose.”Phoebe said, looking straight into his eyes. She was glad they weren't blocked anymore. Even though Miles took them off often now due to his headaches, she still was amazed every time at how bright of a blue his eyes were. 

Miles opened and closed the ring box in his pocket. Open. Close. Open. Close. 

Miles stood up. He kneeled down on one knee. He pulled out the ring box.

“Phoebe, love of my life, will you agree to spend the rest of your life side by side me, to start a family with me, to make a million more memories with me, Phoebe, will you marry me?”tears glistened at Phoebe's cheeks. Most of the conversation going on in the diner stopped as people turned to look at the couple.

Phoebe slightly nodded and pulled Miles up. “Yes.I would love to spend the rest of my life with you. Was there ever any doubt?”Miles laughed as he daintily put the ring on Phoebe's finger. 

They paid the bill and walked out of the diner, hand in hand. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The End



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29 comments

Nirosha P
22:03 Jul 20, 2020

A very nice love story. I like it, it has not twist but that's fine I love it that way too. :) Could you also please check out my story 'Time to think back' I'd love feedback. :)

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Charles Stucker
01:56 Jul 15, 2020

Definitely a proposal... I found it too predictable. Then again, I love the twist ending and many do not. You have a solid writing voice and good pacing. The characters are credible young people in love. You are a bit sloppy with punctuation and parentheses. You need to have a space after a parentheses closes before the next word- you break that rule frequently. You have one or two parentheses just floating around. Go back, read and edit, since it is not to late to get changes in. Again, within the constraints of the prompt, you did a ...

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Amany Sayed
02:42 Jul 15, 2020

Thank you for your feedback. I didn't include any parentheses throughout my story, but will assume you meant quotations and will certainly take that into account in the future.

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Charles Stucker
04:39 Jul 15, 2020

You're right. I meant quotations, just had a senior moment.

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Sweet! 😊

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Amany Sayed
17:35 Sep 02, 2020

Thanks :)

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נιмму 🤎
23:44 Jul 17, 2020

Oh my god I loveeee thisss its such a cute heartfelt story!! Fantastic Job once again!! Also, would u mind checking out my new story Promises are broken? that'd be awesome :P

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C.j Dunstall
23:59 Jul 23, 2020

Thanks 🌻 ꮗꭵꮥꮒ 🌻 for liking my two stories. I was wondering if you could give me a few tips on my page/ profile as to what I can do to make it better. I am a relatively new writer so I do get a lot of things wrong.

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Doubra Akika
16:11 Jul 20, 2020

I think you did a great job. There were some mistakes though, but you can fix them with an editing tool. I like reading romance -any kind of romance- so I enjoyed this. Well done!

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01:20 Jul 19, 2020

Hey, Wish! This was a great story, with a nice story line. I will say that you did have some grammatical errors, but nothing that can't be worked on and fixed! :) Keep writing and stay healthy! -Brooke

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Deborah Angevin
22:41 Jul 15, 2020

Good job with the pacing of the story! I love the twist at the end! Would you mind checking my recent story out, "Orange-Coloured Sky?" Thank you!

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Batool Hussain
16:26 Jul 13, 2020

Aww, this is effortlessly very good. Douce!

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Sarah Freeman
21:58 Aug 06, 2020

I love how nervous he is! And how concerned and caring she is! It’s the perfect love story! Nice job Amany!!!

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Amany Sayed
23:38 Aug 06, 2020

Thank you so much Sarah!

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C.j Dunstall
23:45 Jul 23, 2020

OMG! I LOVE IT. Please write more and tell me when you do. It is so flippin' amazing. It made me think of me and my Bf: he has long hair that grows in his big blue eyes, he wears glasses and is so freaking cute when he takes them off. SERIOUSLY you should write more. I LOVE it. Also it might be predictable but that's what makes it so good.

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Adrienne Parker
21:25 Jul 22, 2020

Hi, I'm from the critique circle! The story was pretty basic, which is okay! I found many errors in spaces, grammar, and punctuation so maybe another read-through and proofreading would help. There wasn't very much adjectives or description, which leaves the readers feeling kind of bored. I liked your style of writing, but you would benefit from practicing, which is amazing to do with Reedsy! Thank you so much for writing! If you are interested, my story is called, "Two White Graves". I'd love to hear some feedback from you!

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🌈juliette ⭐
02:00 Jul 22, 2020

I did like this story, but as many are saying, it was to predicable. Maybe if there was some sort of fight between Phoebe and Miles, The proposal would not be as predicable. Other than that, great story Stay safe :D

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Alexi Delavigne
04:18 Jul 20, 2020

This was such a cute story, I love Phoebe and Miles! I also liked the jump from the opening scene into setting up the proposal, good work :)

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Nancy Drayce
18:59 Jul 19, 2020

Lovely story! Beautifully written!

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Jonathan Blaauw
16:21 Jul 18, 2020

Hey, nice story. Not usually a fan of straightforward romance stories, but I actually enjoyed it. It's well written and easy to read and moves along nicely. I'm going to try read some of your other stuff asap because I enjoy your writing style. Good job.

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Rhondalise Mitza
21:14 Jul 17, 2020

I agree there should be more romance prompts! Also I hope you move higher on the leaderboard too, just don't pass me up haha. Just kidding, but really, I do like your stories and I thought I liked them all before you bio... I mean, I thought I pressed like because I've read most of them, but I guess I hadn't. Oops. Now it's done! Thank you for reading and liking my stories too, Wish!

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Rhondalise Mitza
15:59 Jul 14, 2020

Haha, my friend, you did a wonderful job, but if you think this is quite the romantic cheesy love story that needs a disclaimer... I just wrote two that almost made me laugh while I was writing them because I felt like I was robbing John Green of material. Really. It was bad. But... if you want to check it out by all means go ahead. Tell me what you think! The first one is called Mattress or Box and the second one is called Afra and Gervassi Get Lost.

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20:54 Aug 13, 2020

Well done!!!

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Amany Sayed
21:14 Aug 13, 2020

Thank you.

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Jen Park
09:55 Jul 23, 2020

This story was predictable but I love it that way. Sometimes we just need a lovely story that make us smile. :) The only suggestion is that you might have to start the a new line(or a paragraph) after the direct quotation. But other than that, this was wonderful!

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