Long Awaiting

Submitted for Contest #46 in response to: Write a story that takes place in a writer's circle.... view prompt


 Waves crashed upon the shore down below as Larkspur made it up the hillside. Stopping to catch his breath once he got to the top, Larkspur noticed a change in the wind. Ominous clouds were rolling in. He quickly sought out shelter before it was too late. Moments later, the rain came down in sheets. Occasional thunder rumbled in the background. Larkspur stayed vigilant inside the shelter, watching Mother Nature get drenched. Eventually, the rain slacked off and the sun peeked through the clouds that were not so heavy anymore. The weary explorer turned his head upwards to the sky, and saw that evening was approaching soon. Larkspur decided he would pick up on his excursion the next morning. He dug around in his knapsack for some provisions. After Larkspur consumed them, he built a small fire for warmth and huddled next to it until he drifted off to sleep.

A sigh of relief came over him when an ethereal creature was in his sight. She was quietly harvesting berries. He moves closer but not to alarm her. Her basket contained violets, buttercups, and clover, amongst other findings. She was humming a sweet tune that sounded faintly familiar. He was mesmerized by her beauty. He froze in place when she looked back, but she refocused and continued on her way.

Larkspur was awaken the next morning by a couple of little birds chirping. The remaining embers of the fire smoldered away. He stirs about and extinguishes the campfire by burying it with earth. Larkspur gathered his knapsack and continued on his journey. The morning air was clean and fresh. He hears water trickling in the background. Larkspur followed the sound until he discovered a babbling brook. He walked upstream to find the spring and set his knapsack down. Larkspur reached for his canteen and held it up to the spring. He took a sip of cool water to satisfy his thirst, and continued on his way.

Larkspur saw an open meadow in the distance. He continued on until a rumbling sound stopped him in his tracks. All of a sudden, half a dozen horses ran across the meadow and disappeared over a small hill. A herding dog soon followed, then Larkspur heard a faint voice. He followed the voice for curiosity and also knew that civilization was near. On the other side of the small hill, Larkspur saw a cottage with smoke wafting from the chimney. He grew relieved and progressed onwards to the cottage. As he got closer, the herding dog alarmed its owners of someone approaching. A young woman came around the corner of the cottage to see what was happening. Both Larkspur and the young woman stopped in their tracks and looked at each other. She noticed he looked weary and tired, and she introduced herself.

Hello, I am Amaryllis. Would you like something to eat?

Hello ma'am. Do you mind if I sit down for a spell?

Amaryllis agreed and sat down next to him. She noticed his rugged, handsome appearance.

I'm sorry, but I didn't get your name.

Larkspur introduced himself and took a sip from his canteen. Amaryllis watched him as beads of sweat rolled off his brow. She gets up from the bench, goes inside the cottage, and returned with a clean rag.

He dampened the rag with water to cool his face. Larkspur admired Amaryllis for her hospitality. As she stood before him, he noticed her petite frame. Amaryllis invites Larkspur inside for dinner, and he accepted.

The inside of the cottage was dry and warm. Amaryllis went in the next room to retrieve a cotton shirt. She handed it to Larkspur, and told him to clean up. He obliged to do so. Moments later, he reappeared in the kitchen, feeling refreshed. Amaryllis is drawn to his tousled hair and tanned complexion that is accentuated in the dim light. As they eat dinner, Larkspur is enamored with her poise and porcelain complexion. They continued with their conversation after dinner outside on the porch. Amaryllis listened to Larkspur as he talked about is journey up until now. Larkspur questioned why Amaryllis was by her lonesome. He also listened as she responded to him. Larkspur sensed she was starved for companionship. He wanted to comfort her but remained as a gentleman. Amaryllis grew fond of her new company and offered him a nightcap. He did not want to intrude but she insisted.

Both of them go back inside the cottage for the night. Amaryllis only has one bed. She excused herself to prepare for bed whereas Larkspur tended to the fireplace. She returned adorned in a linen nightgown. Larkspur turned around and noticed her long locks flowing down her back while she turned down the covers. Amaryllis crawled onto the opposite side of the bed. Larkspur sat down on his side, removed his shoes, and stretched out beside her. Once his head hit the pillow, he was out for the count. Amaryllis rested on her side and watched him quietly. The flames in the fireplace eventually died down as the night progressed.

The next morning, Larkspur opened his eyes and saw Amaryllis cuddled up under the covers. She looked peaceful and breathtaking. A chill came over him so he arose from the bed to tend to the fireplace. Movement woke up Amaryllis, and she peered over the covers to see what was happening. She admired Larkspur's diligence with stoking the fire, and asked him to come back to the bed to lay beside her. He agreed to comfort her while they laid together and enjoyed the morning. Anticipation grew in both of them was they continued to get to know one another. Larkspur leaned in closer and kissed Amaryllis. She fervently returned his gesture. The combination of the fire and body heat quickly warmed them both. One by one, articles of clothing were strewn about. Her body rose in excitement as he finished in her. They both fall onto the bed, exhausted.

It was afternoon when both Larkspur and Amaryllis stirred about in the cottage. She did not want him to leave. He loved everything about her. He had been searching for somebody for a while. It also had been some time for her as well. They continued to talk on the porch. Larkspur puts his arm around Amaryllis as they admired the rest of the day. 

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Writers Block
12:36 Jun 20, 2020

Thank you


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08:38 Jun 20, 2020

This is a beautiful love story 😩🤗


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Laura Clark
21:22 Jun 22, 2020

Aw, Larkspur found love! Good for him! You have lots of lovely description dotted through this and it had a very calm feel to it. One piece of advice that I hope is helpful is that if you’ve got one main character and you aren’t at risk of confusing the reader, you can play with how you refer to him. Instead of repeating the character’s name, you could throw in some descriptors (the happy young man) or just use pronouns (he). It gives you a bit of an opportunity to give the reader some extra description. What a lovely read - thank yo...


Writers Block
12:11 Jun 23, 2020

Ah....good point there :)


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