Contest #45 winner 🏆

Constellations

Submitted for Contest #45 in response to: Write a story about community.... view prompt

83 comments

In the beginning, there was nothing.

Then, there was something.

An explosion, a gasp of light in a choking universe that breathed all we know into existence. Quarks and atoms bounced with sweet ecstasy, creation free to their whims. From dust they formed glittering galaxies adorned with brilliant balls of energy. Stars.

Stars were the pride of particles. Their fiery blaze illuminated the darkness, gave life and allowed other creations to be viewed. Up close, massive and glaring, but with an almost inexplicable allure. From a distance, gentle and charming, a reminder that even the blackest landscapes could be penetrated. Most life forms might as well be moths.

As Time traveled in her never-ending passage, the universe kept expanding. New stars were born, planets began to form, accompanied by their little moon sisters. Families formed, held tight in the arms of gravity. All the bodies lived in harmony and were appreciated, from plain asteroids to the glittering stars. They worked together to create melodies of color, an artwork from every perspective, and they were happy.

Eventually, the joy grew with the life that had sprung forth into the universe. Bacteria evolved into lush plantations of all colors. Organisms crittered out of crevices, or made them their homes. Slowly, but surely, sentient life formed their first, tiny civilizations. They worshiped the world that made and named them. In wonder of their origins. Creatures gifted with knowledge used their unique innovation to investigate and learn. Some races and planets moved faster than others, but they all held in commonality a reverence for their speckled skies. A respect. Even beasts possess a love for their kin.

After a few millennia, a new galaxy formed. Within it, a beautiful planet was birthed. Instantly, the universe welcomed another addition. Life had a special vibrancy on Earth. Her oceans were full and her forests were plentiful. All beings knew and respected the balance that supported them. Such understanding made Earth a continuation of the ardour fostered in the cosmos. Through hard and easy times, life persevered.  Especially a species self-declared as humans.

The planet adored her special children. When they stumbled to their feet and stood strong, she gleamed with pride. Their ingenuity led them far. They studied the best traits of their siblings and mastered them. They crafted tools to assist them, used the opposable thumbs they shared with their ancestors. They forged bonds with their wolf brothers and mirrored their pack tendencies. And just like them, they formed tribes, each with unique cultures and beliefs. However, unlike the animals they walked beside, they had the capacity to think, to be aware. They could share their findings and make even larger societies. But, their own stubbornness curbed them. Humanity had another unique trait.

In worlds far far away other beings were also cunning and resilient, but no other species in the universe had such a thing as “arrogance”. They began to take advantage of every resource they could get their hands on. From an initial glance, it seemed a natural course of the food chain. But soon it became clear that they had set their minds on using their abilities for one thing. 

Conquering.

They broke the balance of give and take and started their quest for domination. And they succeeded. Their egos became so grand so that they even dismissed the celestial bodies that had granted them their wondrous gifts. They became the first society to scorn the stars. Their need for superiority led them to seek to even take other planets. Humanity reduced once godly entities to simply their elements, ignoring anything that was not produced by them. They thought themselves unstoppable.

Earth grew more and more in pain and cried out to her own siblings and parents. She recounted her ungrateful children’s mission and transgressions, even to her. The universe is not cruel. They care for each other. Love all for they are all one.

It was proclaimed, “We must bring your children back to the light.”

So a plan was organized. The flashiest beings of the sky would gather to remind the humans of the glory of the skies, the unknown, and humble them. Violence was not once brought to the table. They hoped to reteach love and enchantment, reinforce mutual appreciation. War was never considered.

So. Stars not just from Earth’s own galaxy, but from all over the universe worked to form pictures with their forms. Constellations. Shapes of all kinds decorated the night. Beasts, gods, humans, whatever entertained the mind.

When the humans looked to the sky, awe once again filled their eyes. But not for the intended reason. Endless possibilities danced in their brains. They asked not, “What have I done wrong?”, but “How can I use this?”. It was discovered that the accuracy of their maps could be increased, they could travel to new, far off lands by memorizing the positions of the stars and their new artistic forms. Another tool in their box.

With enhanced navigation, subjugation was even simpler. Where members of their own species were a little behind, they chose not to reach out a hand, but to destroy and hand down plight like the gods they thought they were. And they no longer reined the horse of destruction at just themselves, no, they even began to abuse their own mother.

The universe wept. The moon feared she would be next. Earth was dying.

And the humans? Oh, they revered and “remembered”. Humanity said the stars were important. Just the stars. And it was not because of their beauty or grace. It was because it helped them in their ceaseless race.

A race that never existed because a challenge was never made. Not a soul encouraged the pursuit of “glory”, a bum rush to supremacy. Competition with no opposition is infinite. Humans and other humans. Beasts and other beasts. Galaxies, stars, planets, moons, asteroids, dust. All are able to coexist. To establish an undercurrent below a broken bridge of imaginary differences. Yet, one tiny infinite speck, a singular ash, can set a fire.

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83 comments

Janetra Waters
22:37 Jun 19, 2020

This was absolutely amazing. Every word drew me in. Do you mind if I share this?

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Raven Quill
00:42 Jun 20, 2020

So long as you credit me I don't mind, I'm glad you enjoyed it so much!!

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Janetra Waters
11:44 Jun 20, 2020

Of course.

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Deborah Angevin
21:54 Jun 19, 2020

Congrats for winning!

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Raven Quill
00:41 Jun 20, 2020

Thank you so much ahhhh!!

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Corey Melin
20:17 Jun 19, 2020

Well written and a unique way of community that was brilliant. Congrats!

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Raven Quill
21:26 Jun 19, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Aqsa Malik
14:31 Jun 14, 2020

Woah! This was so bitter sweet, and I absolutely loved the descriptions you used to bring out the beauty of the universe in it's purest form. Human vice is a terrible thing for this planet and you were able to bring that out so effectively with your use of language. I found myself mourning for the stars and mother nature as much as they were. Honestly such a great story, especially for the prompt you went with. Awesome job!

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Raven Quill
19:43 Jun 16, 2020

Thank you so much!! I was really trying to inspire awe and contrast it with our stupid selves haha. I'm so glad it was effective and thank you so much for sharing! I was actually going to go with the solidarity prompt (hence where I got the constellation idea) but it kinda morphed while I was writing ^_^'... But anyways, thank you as a whole, your stuff is super cool too!!

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Aqsa Malik
15:23 Jun 19, 2020

Sis you won! Congrats!!! ♥

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Raven Quill
16:06 Jun 19, 2020

THANK YOU I AM IN SO MUCH SHOCK RIGHT NOW

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Jen Ponig
07:46 Jul 31, 2020

A well written story of the great unfolding of the universe. Congratulations on your win!

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Raven Quill
00:04 Aug 01, 2020

Thank you!!

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Jesna S
02:22 Jul 16, 2020

Wow! Simply wow!

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Raven Quill
20:11 Jul 16, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Cheri Jalbert
04:55 Jul 08, 2020

The sadness of the Earth and the Universe came through clearly. Vivid descriptions and smooth writing to draw the reader deeper into your amazing tale.

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Raven Quill
22:24 Jul 08, 2020

Thank you so much! I was really hoping to portray that correctly :)

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Denise Antwi
10:39 Jul 02, 2020

Very good. Clinging to every word like my life depended on it. Hope to see you write a full-fledged novel or something published.

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Raven Quill
16:09 Jul 03, 2020

That's so kind! I'm glad you enjoyed it!! Thank you!

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03:18 Jul 01, 2020

Thank you so much! Your narrative was perfect, groovy, awesome, and it's life-changing. We love how you tie in constellations like they're supposed to remind us we're all human together. Well done, Raven Quill! I sincerely wish you're the best!

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Raven Quill
19:30 Jul 01, 2020

Well thank you, and you as well!

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Carly Clarissa
15:05 Jun 30, 2020

I love your way with words and the writing is amazing! Congrats on the win, you deserved it!

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Raven Quill
16:28 Jun 30, 2020

Thank you so much!!

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Adelaide Starmer
17:22 Jun 27, 2020

Powerful and dreamlike, "Constellations" carried me away. Beautiful prose that took me for a journey. I had to keep going back to re-read because it swept me away. Congrats-well deserved win!

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Raven Quill
20:44 Jun 27, 2020

AWEEE thank you so much!!!!! :D

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Ingrid Johnson
15:13 Jun 27, 2020

I really love the poetic way you write and the beautiful imagery. This was a beautiful short story - well done! :)

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Raven Quill
20:44 Jun 27, 2020

Thank you so much!

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Zephyr Khera
18:28 Jun 25, 2020

Beautifully written and a super original concept, well done

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Raven Quill
18:46 Jun 25, 2020

Thank you!!

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Lori Colt
22:15 Jun 24, 2020

Gorgeous story. So much imaginative imagery. Especially love this line: "Organisms crittered out of crevices, or made them their homes." Kind of cool to hear the use of the word quark too. I met the scientist, Murray Gell-Mann who discovered the quark. Neat guy. A ++ to you. You deserve the win on this.

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Raven Quill
18:45 Jun 25, 2020

Thank you so much! My friend made fun of me for making up the word crittered, so I'm glad you liked it XD. I also just like the way the word quark sounds, but that's so cool you got to meet him!! All around I appreciate the positive feedback :)

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20:00 Jun 22, 2020

Wow! I love the imagery of creation and the stars and how all living creatures were seen as God sees His children, or a mother her children. Your story reminds me of Greek mythology, where something happens out of nowhere, and now all life is corrupted because of this one element, person or creature. Or the centuries-old tales like Beowulf or Gilgamesh.

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A. S.
20:25 Aug 01, 2020

I absolutely loved reading this story! You deserved this win. Your writing style is absolutely beautiful. Would you be willing to read my new story “On The Edge” and let me know what you think?

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Tina Laing
12:29 Jul 05, 2020

🥳 CongrAts!

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Raven Quill
16:37 Jul 05, 2020

Thank you!!!

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03:18 Jul 01, 2020

Thank you so much! Your narrative was perfect, groovy, awesome, and it's life-changing. We love how you tie in constellations like they're supposed to remind us we're all human together. Well done, Raven Quill! I sincerely wish you're the best!

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Grace Kejo
18:12 Jun 23, 2020

I can't think of any better way to describe what humans have done to the earth, this story is beautifully written and thought-provoking. I LOVE EVERY BIT OF IT. You totally deserved to win :)

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Raven Quill
18:24 Jun 23, 2020

Thank you so much!! I love you for saying that haha XD

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