The Short Story of Love and Loss

Submitted for Contest #42 in response to: Write a story that ends with one character waiting for the arrival of another.... view prompt

45 comments

May 21, 2020

General

“Mom! When will Crystal be here?” Amy said for the 100th time. Crystal is Amy's best friend.

 “Soon, honey!” her mom said.

 “But… I haven’t seen Crystal in years!” 

Her mom laughed, “Yes darling, I know! I bet Bubbeh would love to tell you a story of her time during the holocaust!” 

I laughed. Amy looks at me. 

“Tell me a story!”

 I said, “Ok, ok.” I sighed. “I was about 5, it was 1940…”

“Mommy!” I screamed as I ran into my mom’s arms. 

My mom laughed, “Yes sweetie?”

“I’m HUNGRY!!!” I said.

 My mom laughs, “OK. Let's make food! Go find your sister Molly!”

“OK!!!” I shouted as I ran across the backyard which was covered in blossoming buds. I saw her.

 “MOLLY!” I screamed as she looked up from her spot on the ground.

 “Hiya sis!” she said.

 “C'MON MOLLY, IT'S TIME TO EATTTT!” 

Her eyes grew big. “Really??” 

I laughed, “Yes!” 

I grabbed her hand and dragged her back to our little house. We were having homemade chicken noodle soup. That was when we heard a bang. The Nazis broke through the door and grabbed me, my mom, and my sister. My mom was horrified, but we didn't know what was happening. 

“Mom?” me and Molly said.

 My mom looked at us and snapped, “SHUSH!”

 We were surprised by her snapping at us and fell quiet. We then were shoved into a train. That's when we hear crying. I look around and see a baby in a lady’s arms. The weird thing is the baby isn't crying. I look up to see the woman crying.

 “Oh, I must help her,” I think to myself. I start to get up to hug the woman, but a hand firmly grabs my arm and pulls me down.

 “That hurt!” I complain.

 My mom looks at me, practically glaring.

 “Shush,” she says. 

I start crying. I don't understand why she is being so mean. Molly looks at me. She is two years older than me.

 She grabs me and hugs me while whispering, “It is going to be ok.” 

Then she starts rocking me.

 I look at her, “What is happening? Why is mommy being so mean!”

 She looks down at me and says very sadly, “I don't know...” 

Soon me and her are cuddled up sleeping together. We are woken up to our stomachs growling. The operator brings us some food and some water. As we eat the single piece of toast I see the mother of the baby shaking and I realize she is gonna need more than just 1 piece of toast. I look at my mom and see she is still sleeping. So I quickly go across the train and give the mother the piece of toast I have. She looks at me with the most grateful look ever on her face. I almost started crying. I go back quickly and even though I am hungry I am very proud of myself that I gave her that single piece of toast. Suddenly the train stops. The person who shoved us on the train grabs us and yells at us to follow him. Which we do. We are led to something that looks like a camp. There is dirt and gravel for as far as I can see. It looks so depressing. I walk behind my mom but in front of my big sister. We were directed toward these buildings. They had something that looked like bunk beds except they weren't. They separated the men and women. If you were a female they would put you in a separate building. It was sad to see so many families separated from each other… One man wanted to be with his wife, but he got beat when he was trying to stay with her. I closed my eyes and shoved my body onto my mom. She looks at me and I see a smile, the one I missed so very much. Me and Molly got food making as our job. So we were shoved into the kitchen. I don't know what my mom got because anytime I saw her she always had a grumpy face. YEARS went by and the little baby that I helped feed on the train’s mom raised her son. And me and her son are super close! One day my mom never came back from her job. After that day, I never saw her again. I miss her. One day my sis became super sick. After a few weeks she didn't get any better. The Nazi Soldiers came and took her away… I never saw her again. I was about 8 at this time and lost the two people that I loved. I became very very sad but I pushed through it! I played with a bunch of children who were there. One day almost everyone except like 10-15 people in our sleeping area was gone. I don’t know what happened, but none of my friends who I made were gone so it was fine. One day I was walking through the camp and I met this boy whose name is Jeff. We became close and soon fell in love. I was working in the kitchen and then cleaning up after I was done making food. I heard a scream so I ran outside of the kitchen and saw the little boy who was a baby at the beginning get pulled by a nazi soldier. I ran after them and grabbed the boy, whose name is Gene, and pulled him away from the soldier. I told Gene to run as fast and as far away as he could. The Nazi soldier screamed at me and grabbed me and started pulling me to this building and shoving me in it. I knew a little about these. I knew this was going to be the end, but then I saw Jeff and he grabbed me by the arm and pointed to a door that the Nazi forgot to lock. I was about to scream to everyone else about the door but Jeff put his finger to his lips, so I said nothing and we snuck out and ran off into the distance…

“WOW! BUBBEH!” Amy exclaimed.

 Her mom laughed, “Great story, mom.”

 I smiled. 

“I knew she would love one of your stories.”

 I chuckled and smiled and pulled my daughter and Amy into a hug.

 “I love y’all”. 

Amy pushed me off of her and said “Mom? When is Crystal going to be here?”

 We all laughed.

 “Soon.” My daughter replied, “Very soon.”


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45 comments

00:07 Aug 26, 2020

I loved this story! I got a little bit confused sometimes about what tense it was in ( present or past ) but other then that it was fantastic!!

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Rosey Flower
14:21 Sep 01, 2020

Thanks! I’m sorry I didn’t make that any clearer...

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15:29 Sep 01, 2020

It's ok! It was still awesome!

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Rosey Flower
15:21 Sep 03, 2020

I'm glad you enjoyed it!

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16:23 Sep 24, 2020

Of course! (Don't mind me, just responding almost a month later...)

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Rosey Flower
18:11 Sep 24, 2020

lol thats fine im still here.

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03:14 Jun 05, 2020

I loved this story, like all of the others! I agree with what Evelyn said, this story caught my attention really easily. I think that when Bubbeh was telling the story, you should've split it up into smaller paragraphs. That way it's easier to read. Keep writing and stay safe! :) -Brooke

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Rosey Flower
19:27 Jun 05, 2020

Okay👌! I will keep that in mind for next time! 😄

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19:37 Jun 05, 2020

:D

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The Daltons
22:02 Oct 09, 2020

I loved this! The only thing is that I sort of had a hard time understanding it because I didn't know what part of time this was at, which you could change with a page break.

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Rosey Flower
14:00 Oct 12, 2020

Thanks and ok! I will fix that the next time I write a story!

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The Daltons
20:53 Oct 12, 2020

Great! Glad I could help

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10:08 Sep 23, 2020

Hey, Rosey would you be kind to watch the first video it's on Harry potter. https://youtu.be/KxfnREWgN14 Sorry for asking your time, I would ready your story

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Rosey Flower
18:01 Sep 23, 2020

i will watch just to watch it you dont need to read my story

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Rosey Flower
18:08 Sep 23, 2020

THAT WAS SUPER GOOD! I loved it!

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06:53 Sep 24, 2020

Thanks a lot

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Rosey Flower
18:10 Sep 24, 2020

you're welcome!

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Batool Hussain
13:29 Jun 13, 2020

Hey Rosey ! This is an amazing piece. Love it! Also, will you mind checking my stories out? Thanks

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Rosey Flower
22:58 Aug 16, 2020

I will!

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Lynn Penny
20:26 May 27, 2020

Cute! Nice Family Dynamic. My only advice would be to split up large pieces of text to make it easier to read. Great Job!

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Rosey Flower
20:57 May 27, 2020

Thanks! Especially the critique! I will try harder next time!

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Nunya Business
21:08 Sep 11, 2020

Liked the story I just posted a new one please read

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Rosey Flower
12:26 Sep 14, 2020

okay i will!

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Krishi Norris
13:48 Aug 18, 2020

GREAT story, Rosy! Mind checking out a few of mine? Thanks!

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Rosey Flower
21:39 Aug 20, 2020

Sure and thank you

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Raquel Rodriguez
01:21 Aug 11, 2020

Love this, Rosey! I have a few suggestions though. #1: If you're telling this story in past tense, then you should say, 'Crystal was Amy's best friend...' instead of, 'Crystal is Amy's best friend...' #2: Same thing here about the past tense thing. 'Amy looks at me' The story is past tense, which means that all of these things have happened, they aren't happening. The sentence should be, 'Amy looked at me' #3: In the beginning of the story, when Amy is asking when Crystal will arrive, instead of her saying that, ju...

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Rosey Flower
22:54 Aug 16, 2020

I'm sorry I'm not on as much as i used to but, thanks! I will keep that in mind next time I write a story!

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Raquel Rodriguez
02:59 Aug 17, 2020

:) It's fine, hope I helped you a bit!

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Rosey Flower
21:38 Aug 20, 2020

You did!

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Raquel Rodriguez
18:16 Aug 21, 2020

:D

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Evelyn ⭐️
19:57 May 30, 2020

I loved this story!! It fits the prompt SO well, and it caught my attention so easily! You are such a talented writer, I have loved ALL your stories! Can't wait to read more! Keep writing and stay safe!

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Rosey Flower
13:38 Jun 01, 2020

Thank you! You stay safe too!

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Avani G
17:45 May 21, 2020

Yay! You wrote again, haha!

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Rosey Flower
17:47 May 21, 2020

Yeah of course I did! Lol!

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Avani G
17:49 May 21, 2020

Haha

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Rosey Flower
17:57 May 21, 2020

I told you, I would write another story. XD

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Avani G
18:03 May 21, 2020

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Rosey Flower
22:30 May 21, 2020

<3

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