Commented on: Once More...
05:54 Dec 28, 2019
Paragraph 7, 16, 18, seem to break in the middle of the line and start again on a new line. Initially, I thought it was a device to emphasise something (I enjoy the use of unusual formatting, sentence structure, etc., as long as it is consistent and adds to the experience.) It pulled me out of the story because I went back to see if I had missed something. If you cut and pasted it from a word processing program, it can sometimes scramble things in the pasting. I had one of my stories do this a while back, and it created unusual gaps between... read more