Commented on: Waiting for Wells
23:00 Mar 04, 2020
The narrative is done well. I felt as if the Lola was speaking to me. At one point I thought she was a cat waiting for her feline companion to return. There are grammatical errors, most easily navigated. The one that stood out to me, "I can't see him let me go!!!” requires a semi-colon or period after can't see him. The missing punctuation changes the meaning of your sentence.
I can't wait to read more.